RHOC RECAP: MY WAY OR THE FENG SHUI

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Well, Episode 2 was a little bit more….intense, I guess you could say, than last week’s.  Still, I’m not sure if I’m feeling this. But let’s discuss.

We meet Elaine, Shannon’s “Feng Shui Consultant”or  “Expert” or whatever it is you want to call her.  I have to admit, I’m totally into stuff like that.  Well, not totally, my house is not Feng Shui’d (is that a word?), but I do find it interesting.  Do I believe in it?  Maybe.  (In high school I rearranged my room so my bedroom would face the door, because I read online that it means you’re open to love.) I’m all about good energy and positive vibes.  However, labeling the sink and stove by gender seems like things are being taken a little bit too far, but that’s just my opinion.

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Next we see Vicki at her office, complaining about how stressful it is to move her entire office.  (Cue the eye roll here.)  God forbid work is demanding!  And let’s be honest here, Vicki isn’t moving anything herself.  So please, spare me.  (I helped move the office I work at now about two years ago, with Kirsten and Sharon.  Who, at the time, were both pregnant.  So Vicki, just no.)

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I love seeing Jim with Aspen.  I think he’s so cute with her.  Also, what is with everyone’s remarks about the difficulties of motherhood?  Don’t get me wrong, I love Meghan.  I think she’s a wonderful mother, and I think she has such a cute, nice, normal family.  I just don’t understand the commentary I’m hearing.  Has no one ever been around children before? Um, yes, they are demanding.  No, your life isn’t just yours anymore, it revolves around your child.  Did everyone think having babies would be like a Summer stroll through the park?

So….Lydia.  Ugh.  I tried really hard last week to have an open mind about her being back on the show, but I just can’t.  We see her and her husband, Doug, doing a photo shoot for their magazine, Nobleman (anyone else ever hear of this?), and I’m just bored.  Her behavior is so bizarre to me.  She’s literally in la la land.  Here, we also (very briefly) meet Peggy.  (Doug knows Peggy’s husband, and they also participated in the photo shoot for Nobleman.)  I think the conversation about Peggy’s mastectomy, brought up by Lydia, was entirely inappropriate at that given moment.  You literally just met her.  Talk about invading someone’s personal space or putting them on the spot.  Peggy responded very politely, and I couldn’t tell if she took any offense to the questioning.  I don’t think Lydia was talking about it in a negative way, at all, I just don’t think it’s something she should have brought up.  It’s not her story to talk about.

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Finally we see my girl, Tamra.  She is seriously so cute and chic.  She’s with Ryan, Sarah and Ava, discussing the details of Ava’s first birthday party.  (Side note: Ryan and Sarah are so weird.  In general, and to each other.)  Tamra’s reaction to Brianna’s invite to Ava’s birthday is surprising to me.  Any time Vicki and Tamra fought in the past, Tamra remained closed to Brianna.  I don’t think it’s fair for Tamra to take her issues with Vicki out on her.

Unfortunately, it’s time for Kelly to have some screen play.  Watching Kelly and Michael work out is the most boring thing I’ve ever seen.  I’d rather stare at the wall, seriously.  We’re about halfway through the episode at this point, and here I am, bored out of my mind again.  I miss Heather.  Can we please bring her back?  RHOC is not the same without her.  I just feel like I don’t love these women like I used to!  I want Fancy Pants. And I want Lydia to go away.  Okay, sorry, end rant.

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*This is my face every time Kelly is on screen.

Sophie going to prom was boring.  The only thing I really took away from that entire scene was that Shannon said “Cotillion” about eight times, and I literally yelled at the screen when David told Shannon not to eat the bread.  Fuck off, David, we’ll eat the whole loaf of bread if we want to!

We finally get to meet Peggy for more than just a moment, and so far, I like her.  I think she seems sweet, maybe a little conceited.  Her story did touch me, though.  I admire her strength and her determination, especially for taking action so quickly like she did.  Her family seems very genuine to me; they have a silly, loving banter with each other.  The gifts from her husband (I’m totally blanking on his name right now) were sweet, but extremely lavish.  Over the top?  I don’t know, I guess some girls would die for gifts like that.  Personally, I don’t understand it.  $75,000 on a bracelet?  I guess if you have the money to spend…..it’s just not me.

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Here comes Vicki again, forever playing the victim.  She automatically assumes Tamra invited Brianna to Ava’s birthday to “drive a wedge” between them.  Please.  Vicki, you’re the only one who can drive a wedge between you and your daughter.  Also, are you forgetting that you have chosen others over Brianna in the past?  Hello, Brooks?  So many eye rolls.

We’ve made it Ava’s birthday.  I seriously do not understand the importance of having such an extravagant birthday party for a one year old, but I will admit I was impressed.  Unicorns will always get my blessing.  I also want that cake for my next birthday, just an FYI.  The Tamra & Brianna situation is very awkward, and I blame them both for it, honestly.  Neither of them were mature in the situation.  Tamra, go say hello.  Brianna, I get it, you feel weird, but this is Tamra’s grandchild’s party – go break the ice.  Brianna leaving without saying a word to Tamra is so odd.  Time for everyone to grow up.

Oh, joy- Judy’s back.  She’s literally insane.  She has to be doing a lot more than just smoking pot.  She’s running around throwing confetti on everyone.  She seriously bugs me out.

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And for the good part (though this was barely exciting, so it’s a little bit sad that this is “the good part”.)  Tamra, Shannon & Lydia’s discussion about Vicki.  Ugh, I was beyond annoyed.  Lydia, why are you stirring the pot?  You do not know anything that happened between Vicki and Shannon, for starters.  If you want to give your opinion to Tamra, do it somewhere privately.  I get it, she’s your friend.  But you literally just met Shannon.  It’s not your business.  Did Shannon take it just a little bit too far?  Well, yes.  But it’s Shannon, she always does.  Lydia was really over dramatic though, saying that Shannon “yelled in her face”, and also calling her an evil witch.  Shannon may have overreacted a little bit, she’s far from an “evil witch.”  She also did not yell in your face. Of course, things are blown out of proportion like they always are, and Shannon storms off in anger, and Lydia states she doesn’t think they’ll get along and she doesn’t want to hang out.  I swear, this is high school.

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We get a glimpse of next week, and of course, Kelly is starting shit in the middle of the restaurant, being her super classy self.  (I will admit I was surprised to see Shannon flip out like that.  At least, I was surprised to see her have an outburst at a restaurant.)  I can only imagine what Kelly did to drive her to that.

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Until next week….

 

xo

RHOC RECAP: THE GREAT DIVIDE

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After a crazy season last year, RHOC is finally back!  Season 12 premiered on Monday, 7/10/17.  I love all of the Housewives, but the OC holds a special place in my heart because it’s the first one that got hooked me on all of the others.  So, if you’re a super fan like me, you may have been disappointed in the first episode. (Disappointed is an understatement, actually.)  The preview for the season does look good, however, and I have to remember, the first episode is basically just catching us up on the cast.  So let’s just get right into it.

First, we meet Shannon’s new dog, Archie.  (So cute.  But maybe you guys should consider getting a fence? Or a leash?  Just a thought.)  Hearing Shannon talk about struggling with her weight is something I can 100 % relate to.  Being uncomfortable in your own body is the worst feeling, so I get it.  I feel her pain. With that being said, I wonder if David is actually being distant like Shannon thinks, or if her insecurity and lack of confidence is making her feel that way.  I’m going to go with the latter.

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Cut to Vicki & Kelly at Vicki’s business.  My first thought when Vicki was talking about how her company has expanded – how?  Who would want to have insurance through Vicki Gunvalson?  Anyway.  When Vicki & Kelly start talking about Tamra, and they bring up her fitness competition from last season, I couldn’t help but roll my eyes.  Yes, I’m sure you were both so bored, that’s why you were cheering for Tamra the entire time.  Please.  Vicki and Kelly are the ultimate Mean Girls.  They feed off each other; they are both insane and convince each other that they are right.  Kelly saying that Tamra and Shannon owe Vicki an apology is laughable.  Vicki, you spread a rumor that Eddie was gay – you’re lucky that Tamra yelling in your face is all that happened.

“They’re not the popular girls, we are the popular girls!”

That’s a direct quote from Vicki Gunvalson.  Sorry, forgot that we were in high school.

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When we’re reintroduced to Lydia, I couldn’t help but feel pure disappointment.  Lydia is sweet, she’s kind, she’s kind of out there – but oh my god she is so boring.  Why did they thing bringing her back was good a idea?  God, I miss Fancy Pants SO much.  We meet Lydia again at Bible Study with Tamra.  This story line feels very forced to me. (Also – Bible Study?) I will say that when Tamra became upset about her daughter, Sydney, it broke my heart.  I was glad that she was in Bible Study at that moment, with those women, and had people to lean on and people that are supportive of her.  It was nice to see women just being nice to one another.

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We only catch a glimpse of Meghan.  But oh my goodness, how cute is Aspen!? And I was surprised at how cute Jim was with her as well.  I didn’t expect that out of him.

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We also learn that Vicki is still with Steve.  Do we like Steve?  I mean, Briana seems to like him.  Hence her basically forcing marriage on Vicki.  Is she doing this for stability for her mom?  Probably.  And I definitely trust Briana’s judgement over Vicki’s.  (We do not trust Vicki’s judgement when it comes to men, ever.  She stated herself that she married her first husband because he had a nice ass and a great car. She also lied to the entire world about her Brooks having cancer.  So no.)  Also – Vicki misses Brooks? I’m going to guess right now that things with Vicki and Steve will probably not work out.  (If Steve’s normal, they won’t.)  I think if given the chance, Vicki would gladly run back into Brook’s arms if he would have her.

We barely see Kelly.  Of course, when we do, she’s being her usual, vile self, and talking about vaginal rejuvenation with, of all people, her mother.  Gross.

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I can’t believe how old/big Briana’s boys are!  They’re both very cute.  Hearing Briana say, “It’s hard having toddlers.”, though, is another eye rolling moment.  Give me a break, Briana, what did you think it was going to be like?  I still don’t truly understand why she left Oklahoma and her husband.  The whole situation is weird.

This is the point in the show where I literally was just like – dammit, I’m bored. We cut over to Lydia, who is teaching her son how to ride a bike.  Is this what the show has come to?

Shannon & Tamra meet up at a little boutique to shop for Shannon’s daughter and Tamra’s niece; they both have a dance coming up.  We listen to Shannon (again) complain about her weight.  Is this going to be Shannon’s story line for the entire season?  Because it’s going to get old fast.  I agree with Tamra 100% – you cannot blame your weight gain on another person.  Vicki is not to blame for Shannon’s weight gain.  I know, I said I was sympathetic towards Shannon.  And I am.  But it is what it is – complaining about it, blaming outside factors, none of that is going to change anything.  Trust me, I know this firsthand.  It sucks and it’s hard.  But let’s focus on something else, like enjoying shopping with your daughter for her dance. Life is just too short.

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Finally, we close off the episode with Vicki and Lydia meeting up for lunch. (So forced! “I haven’t seen you in forever!”  Of course you haven’t, Lydia wasn’t needed when she wasn’t on the show.)  Here we see Vicki still not taking responsibility for any of her actions, and victimizing herself per usual.  When Vicki talks about Tamra calling her a con woman, she is downright outraged, which baffles me.  Vicki – YOU ARE A CON WOMAN.  You literally straight up lied about Brooks having cancer!  How can you possibly believe that you were somehow wronged?  You also should never have “repeated” a rumor that your best friend’s husband was gay, nor should you ever bring up someone else’s child.  Tamra has done neither of those things to you, am I right? I just can’t understand why Vicki doesn’t think she did anything wrong.  I can’t wrap my head around it.

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Hopefully, next episode is a little bit more eventful.  The preview looked so/so.  We will be introduced to Peggy, who I’m totally unsure about.  We also catch a glimpse of Shannon & Lydia have an argument.  I wonder if sides end up switching, since Tamra seems to be close to Lydia now.  Guess we’ll wait and see.

 

PS: WE MISS YOU HEATHER!!!! & SHOW US YOUR HOUSE!

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Until next week….

 

xo