Holy shit. I have so many thoughts after watching Part 1. This was absolutely insane and we’ve barely covered anything! Staying neutral is going to be so hard but I’m going to try my best.

Before I start – can we talk about how beautiful the ladies look? I’m loving (almost) everyone’s look. I’m not crazy about Kam’s – I’m all for pink, and I actually do like the dress, but her makeup is a little much. I also generally despise cut out shoulders, so Cary’s dress is not my favorite but she still looks gorgeous. My favorite look is definitely Steph’s; so natural yet still so glamorous and beautiful. D’Andra is a total Boss Ass Bitch in that pants suit – Slay, Queen. 👸🏻 Brandi always looks amazing in blue, totally her color. I also agree with Andy, I’m loving the high pony. LeeAnne is literally glowing, loving the dress, so pretty.

We start off with Andy greeting all of the Delightful Divas of Dallas. We learn that Brandi’s adoption is finalized, Mama Dee did not take the keys back from D’Andra, and Steph feels amazing being married to a Harvard Man. Andy tells Cary she “spilled the tea” in Denmark – he has questions about her casually mentioning that she dated Lance Armstrong. (It was only like, 6 months to a year.) Moving on to Kam – “Hey Girl” ~ LMAO Andy has her down. He calls her Nicole Kidman’s doppelgänger and I never noticed this before but I totally agree. Kam’s day is made. Last but not least; “Namaste, LeeAnne.” I’m literally crying watching them meditating – and at Brandi’s “WTF is going on?” Face. 😂😂

We start off lightly, and we have a montage of all the fun times the girls had. Steph & Brandi make me LOL every time I see them together. Callie-Roo is basically famous at this point. Andy asks Steph if the kangaroo is legal, and Steph says she honestly doesn’t know. We’re all laughing at Kam riding the bull, and how she pronounces it. We flashback to Steph having her vaginal rejuvenation procedure and Andy asks how Travis likes it. Literally only Andy Cohen could get away with these questions! LMAO.

We get to our first viewer comment, and it’s about LeeAnne giving D’Andra a lap dance when they were at the rodeo, and that it looked professional. Andy asks LeeAnne if she was ever a stripper (legit only Andy!) and she says no. She says it looks like it could be a good job, because she “talks shit for a living” for Andy. Andy compliments her on her shit talking, but I’m thinking this is more of a dig than actual compliment.

I hate being back in Beaver Creek so much, everything about this scene infuriates me. (Except for Brandi’s impersonations.) Andy asks if Justin Bieber rented The Westcott’s home in Beaver Creek, and we learn that he did not, but Taylor Swift did. (I think that’s so cool! I’m such a celebrity stalker LOL.)

Andy brings up D’Andra and LeeAnne arguing over who the “Queen Bee” is, and LeeAnne tells us that D’Andra (supposedly) said that being a housewife is all about status, and that none of them were actually qualified to be housewives until she joined the cast. Brandi interrupts LeeAnne and said that D’Andra never said that when they are at Beaver Creek, and D’Andra speaks up and says she never said that. Cary chimes in and says, “She said that there wouldn’t be a show without her.” I’m sorry, I call total bullshit on that. Cary has literally been tattling on EVERYONE all season – you honestly expect me to believe that D’Andra said that and this is the first time Cary is bringing it up? Please. 🙄 Brandi interjects and says that LeeAnne is the one who says that, and then she does an impression of her, saying, “You carry this show like a turtle on your back.” (Andy laughing at this made me LOL.) D’Andra also adds that LeeAnne is the one who went to InTouch Magazine, saying that there would be no show without her, and that, “all roads lead back to LeeAnne Locken.”

The girls continue arguing, and then D’Andra drops a bombshell. “LeeAnne, for two years I’ve held a secret about you so I’m going to reveal it right now.” D’Andra says that before she joined the show, LeeAnne told her that Cary was going to “Fat Shame” her like she did to her husband, Mark, in Season 1. (Just a side note, I’ve never seen Season 1.) This entire scene is so bizarre to me – LeeAnne denies saying it, but Cary freaks the fuck out on D’Andra, and tells her, “Fuck you for thinking I said that.” Why the hell is Cary so pissed at D’Andra for telling her something that LeeAnne had said? Cary says she never fat shamed Mark – and I honestly believed her (like I said, I didn’t watch the first season) and then we get a lovely clip of Cary telling us in S1 that Mark was a “total fixer upper” and that he was a “chubby plastic surgeon with man boobs.” For real? Can you imagine ever saying something like that about your husband? Yeah, me either. This honestly makes me see Cary in an entirely different light.

Andy asks LeeAnne if she ever said that to D’Andra, and she says no. Cary comes for D’Andra again and tells her that “she’s the dumb bitch that believed her” about L’s comment. (What is happening here?) I’m becoming increasingly annoyed with these three – I do believe that LeeAnne said that, and I also believe that Cary believes she said it as well, but she has it out for D for some reason. Kam is nodding in agreement.

We talk about Brandi & D’Andra’s unexpected reconciliation, which I love. D’Andra talks about how fun loving and light Brandi is, and I’m so pissed that the producers decide to take this moment to film the three girls on the other couch talking shit. So petty.

We’re back in Beaver Creek – this time to discuss Kam & Steph’s argument. Andy asks Kameron if she was sorry once she actually watched the scene back and realized that Steph never said what she thought she said. Kameron isn’t sorry, and just says that it was a misunderstanding. Steph stays true to herself and stands by the fact that she believes Kameron was making the moment all about her and that she was being selfish. I totally agree. Kameron still isn’t ready to let this go and begins to question Brandi again about why she didn’t tell anyone about Bruin. Then she actually comes for Stephanie, saying that she doesn’t think it’s okay to joke about having a surrogate. Kameron, what planet are you on? Steph made up a completely harmless lie on a whim because she was keeping Brandi’s secret. She was being a good friend, and she never joked about surrogacy. Everyone else agrees Kameron is totally is out of line and that Steph meant no harm and did nothing wrong.

Andy asks D’Andra what she thinks about the whole situation, and she says she thinks it’s none of Kameron’s business. Kameron uses this opportunity to say, “How can you say that when you’re always in LeeAnne’s business?” D’Andra claps back with, “That’s like the pot calling the kettle black and you’re very good at that Kameron.” Cary tells D’Andra not to “deflect” and I’m honestly just wondering when Cary got balls this season?

Stephanie’s segment has me super emotional. I have the chills rewatching her open up about her depression and suicide attempt. My heart hurts for her, but at the same time I’m amazed by her strength and courage and bravery. It takes guts to talk about mental health, and as someone who also struggles with depression, anxiety and takes antidepressants, I applaud her honesty. It’s not easy, but it’s so important to keep talking about these hard topics, because there is still such a huge stigma surrounding mental health in general. Everyone is very supportive of Stephanie, which makes me happy. She is so sweet, she deserves the best of everything – including friends.

LeeAnne is up next; we start off with her newfound love of mediation, her amygdala, and her & Rich’s relationship. Andy says he sees a change in LeeAnne, and she says that she meditates every morning and also sees two therapists. “You’ve never told me you see two therapists.” LeeAnne replies by telling D’Andra that they barely speak, so why would she have told her? (Which makes sense.) D’Andra says that they were speaking at the beginning of the season and she still didn’t share it. Cary butts in – “she just told me recently” and D’Andra gets pissed and tells Cary that she’s “talking to LeeAnne.” LeeAnne jumps down D’Andra’s throat for this and tells her not to be condescending to Cary. Cary says that D’Andra is being a bitch to her, but Brandi takes the heat off of D by interrupting and saying she doesn’t believe LeeAnne. She then confesses that Tiffany (as in Tiffany Hendra from S1) told Brandi that LeeAnne doesn’t see a therapist, and that it’s bullshit. LeeAnne doesn’t believe that Tiffany said that. Brandi tells her to tell them her therapists name – and at first I’m like, why wouldn’t she tell them? Then I thought about it a little more, and I realize that I wouldn’t share with the world the name of my therapist either. So I get it. It’s not really anyone’s business.

Andy reads another viewer comment – “Why aren’t you on medication instead of banging your bowl and blaming it on your amygdala?” LeeAnne says she “appreciates that she didn’t google it”, which D’Andra finds hilarious. LeeAnne snaps at D’Andra and calls her a bitch, and tells her to “shut the fuck up”, which I found extremely aggressive, seeing that D’Andra really hadn’t said anything. LeeAnne explains amygdala, and D’Andra speaks up, saying, “Last year it was PTSD, this year it’s amygdala, what’s it going to be next year?” Cary comes at D’Andra again and D has had enough. “Cary I’m sorry you haven’t had an opinion all year and now suddenly you have balls of steel!” D’Andra is on fire! 🔥

Andy brings up the rumor that LeeAnne has spread about Mark last year (he gets his d sucked at the roundup, by other dudes) and asks Cary why she was so receptive to being friends with LeeAnne after she said that. Cary says she wasn’t, but she has forgiven her and she saw a change in her and she deserved grace. (I would never be able to befriend someone who said something like that about my husband. Maybe I’d make nice for the show, but genuine friends? Fuck no.) Cary suddenly clarifies the rumor – it was a disgruntled florist who said it (like wait, what?????) and Andy points out that LeeAnne is still the one who started the rumor. D’Andra is the only one who says exactly what I’m thinking – it’s fucking weird that these two are friends and that they’re having dinner together with their significant others. I’m sorry, there’s just no coming back from that rumor, in my opinion.

Cary calls D’Andra out and tells her that she hasn’t been a good friend. Kameron says that D’Andra texted her and was talking shit about Carys business, as well as Brandi’s clothing line, BrandiLand. Cary says she “disparaged her business publicly.” Kam gives Andy her phone so he can see the message. “It’s not really disparaging her business publicly if she’s sending this to you privately.” Cary tells D’Andra that she thought they were friends and that she’s hurt. D’Andra vehemently denies that she sent those messages, and she gives Andy her phone so he can go through the messages and see for himself that they’re not there. Andy looks and confirms that the texts are not in D’Andra’s phone. Kam says she could’ve deleted them, which Andy agrees with. D’Andra says she didn’t delete anything, and Andy says he’s not saying he believes it, but it’s possible. LeeAnne tells us that D’Andra has two phones, and she finally loses it. “I do not have two phones! You’re fucking delusional!” Kameron is still badgering D’Andra, telling her to admit that she sent the messages. Kam wants to call AT&T and I’m literally dying when Andy goes into full blown dad mode and is like “We are not calling AT&T right now.” 🤣

Andy turns his attention to Stephanie and asks her if she still thinks LeeAnne has truly changed. Steph said that at the beginning of the season she did, but towards the end she felt like LeeAnne was triggered and reverted back to her old ways. LeeAnne keeps saying that she was pushed. Which brings us to Brandi and LeeAnne’s Feud.

Andy brings up what happened at the finale, and he asks Brandi if she was trying to provoke LeeAnne. Brandi says no, she was genuinely pissed off. Andy then comments that LeeAnne was “hissing like a cobra” at Brandi, and LeeAnne says, “I was?”

Yes, you were. And it was scary AF. Andy comments that Brandi and LeeAnne seemed to start off on the right foot, and LeeAnne wants to know what set Brandi off.

This question alone sets Brandi off, and I don’t blame her. Andy explains that he thinks LeeAnne telling D’Andra to “be careful” about being her friend is what triggered it, and Brandi agrees. Stephanie thinks this all goes way deeper than that, that they had issues prior to that that they never fully got over.

Andy also brings up LeeAnne’s allegation of Brandi being an “alcoholic.” I’m so annoyed during this scene – LeeAnne, please fucking own it. It doesn’t matter if you said it once, you still said it and insinuated it all season. None of the girls think Brandi has a drinking problem, including LeeAnne. LeeAnne apologizes, but Brandi calls her out and says that she already apologized, and then she went and said that she’s not sophisticated enough to be an alcoholic, that she’s just a drunk. Andy asks LeeAnne what that means and she says she was just being a wise-ass. Steph sticks up for Brandi, saying that’s not okay that she said those things, and that she inferred that Brandi had a problem all season. Steph says it’s not fair because it puts a label on her that’s not true. Agreed. LeeAnne apologizes again, saying that she’s genuinely sorry. Sorry, but I don’t buy it.

LeeAnne’s conversation with Mama Dee gets brought up – and I don’t remember what D’Andra says right now, but LeeAnne bugs out and tells her to “go jump in a lake and drown.” Like what???? LeeAnne had said in her blog that she recorded her conversation with Mama Dee, but then she admits to everyone that she lied. Andy’s like, “So you lied in your blog?” And everyone agrees that’s fucked up. “I’m really good at-” LeeAnne starts, and Andy finishes with, “Lying?” He then says, “You’ve copped to a lot of lying this season.” To which LeeAnne responds, “I’ve picked it up from them”, referring to Brandi and D’Andra.

Part 1 is over, and my jaw is still on the floor. What did I just witness? I honestly wrote OMFG at the bottom of my notes when this was over. This was a lot to take in. Tell me all of your thoughts! Are you on anyone’s side? Or do you see all angles? Leave me a comment!

Until next week…..


Pump Rules is back and I couldn’t be more excited! Let’s just get right into it.

We start out at Sur – Scheana and Lala are heading into work, Katie is already waiting tables and Tom (Sandoval) and Ariana are behind the bar. Tom tells Ariana he forgot his head phones and I’m LOLing at the reason – it’s Tuesday, and James is DJ-ing. “James starts at one level and gets louder and louder.” Lala is at the front at the hostess stand, and we catch a quick glimpse of Billie Lee, who tells Lala “No phones allowed.” Also LOLing at Lala, “This bitch thinks she’s my boss, that’s real cute.”

Over at Brittany & Jax’s, we learn that Jax really regrets what he put Brittany through last year. He admits he took Brittany for granted. He tells us he left his job at Sur, but he didn’t take his dream job (the hockey one) because he chose being with his dream girl. Brittany is telling Jax that she is not looking forward to work because she doesn’t want to see James. Apparently at the last See You Next Tuesday event, James brought up Jax cheating on Brittany while he was DJ-ing.

Cut to Sur – Sandoval is telling James to “Watch it with the freestyling.” Hearing James say, “I don’t feel bad that I said it, I feel bad that Brittany was standing right next to me when I did,” honestly infuriated me. Ummmm I thought you and Jax were friends? Even if they weren’t – Brittany is such a sweetheart. Why would you ever want to upset her?

Back over at Brittany & Jax’s, we learn how upset Brittany was when it happened – she was hiding out in the lounge, in tears. Jax is livid and is so fed up with James. We learn that Jax has texted James, basically calling him out, which James interprets as “threats.” Eye roll.

Lisa & Ken arrive at Sur and they’re greeted by Lala. This is the first time that Lisa has been back to the restaurant since her brother passed, 5 weeks ago. Lala asks Lisa how she’s doing, and then she apologizes and says that it was a silly question given the current situation. Lala talks about how her dad passed two months prior, and Lisa and Lala share an intimate, sad but heartfelt, moment.

Scheana is waiting on some guy, who she’s flirting with. We learn from Scheana in her confessional that Rob broke up with her on August 31, 2017. Jesus. 🤦🏼‍♀️

Jax is dropping Brittany off at work, and he decides that he is going to go in and confront James. He tries to get James to go out back with him, but James refuses, saying he has work. Jax brings up the shit that James pulled the week before, and James apologizes. Jax tells him that “apologies don’t matter.” James asks Jax if he’s ever done something “without thinking twice about it.” Jax is pissed and he’s not accepting the apology. (I don’t blame him.) Jax tells James he’s not invited to any events that he and Brittany will be having in the future, which upsets James. James, what do you expect dude? You can’t go around acting like a total dick and think it’s okay. It’s not. He’s being such a trouble maker.

Over at the bar, Ken tells Lisa that she overheard Jax yelling at James. Lisa is concerned. Sandoval fills in Lisa on what went on with James, and she’s not happy with him. She thinks it’s extremely inappropriate.

Tom Schwartz, Stassi, and her new bae, Beau, are having dinner. I am so happy for Stassi! She broke up with Patrick last year, and she’s been dating Beau for the past 6 months. I love her confessional when she’s talking about him and she becomes emotional. “Are you crying?” “Yes, omg I’m so embarrassed I don’t know why.” LMAO I love her. ❤️

We learn that Schwartz is practicing the art of balance – instead of full shots he takes half shots. LOLOL. Jax joins them and fill them in on what happened with James, and everyone agrees that James is being a total douche. Jax drops the bombshell that he’s going to propose to Brittany on Thursday. Schwartz already knew, but Stassi didn’t, and she’s super excited. She tells Jax that she has seen a huge change in him, but she also threatens his life if he ever thinks about hurting Brittany again.

Katie, Lala And Kristen are getting ear piercings. Lala tells us that she and James no longer have a friendship. The final straw was when they were at Coachella, and James made a comment like, “We all know each other inside and out.” Randall, Lala’s boyfriend, was pissed. Lala thinks James is beyond disrespectful and she’s over it. She shares with Katie and Kristen that he thinks he can just act however he wants. Kristen is angry about what he did to Brittany. Katie tells us, “Times up on James.” James, the girls are coming for you. I’d be scared.

Over at Villa Blanca, Ken & Lisa are having lunch with The Toms. They’re discussing TomTom and the cocktail list they’re coming up with. I love their enthusiasm over their crazy drink concoctions. Lisa tells them that she needs something, so they’re going to put their list together with Pandora, because she’s creating a cocktail list also. This confused me. Why is Pandora creating a cocktail menu? Like Sandoval says, “I didn’t know Pandora was a mixologist.” Agreed. I feel like The Toms definitely do not get treated fairly in this partnership with Lisa.

Brittany & Stassi are taking their dogs to the dog park, and Britt is telling Stassi how happy she is in her relationship and how great things have been. Stassi hates that she knows about the proposal and is feeling super awkward trying to hold it in.

After The Toms left Villa Blanca, they meet up with Jax and go with him to pick up Brittany’s ring. Jax went all out – the ring he chose for Britt is absolutely stunning. He tells The Toms that he knows it’s big, and out of his budget, but when his father passed he used some of the money he got from him to buy the ring. He says Brittany deserves it, and when he looks at the ring he sees a piece of his dad.

Sandoval is shocked at the news of Jax proposing, and he tells Jax that he doesn’t want him to just propose because his Dad passed. Jax tells him that he knew Brittany was the one when his Dad passed – she was there for him and took care of everything. He realized that she was his soulmate.

It’s Thursday! Jax and Brittany are getting ready for their date, and Brittany has no idea a proposal is coming. Britt tells Jax that the Lyft is here, and Jax can’t fit the box with the ring anywhere, so he decides to just put it in his pants, lmao.

Stassi and Kristen head over to Tom & Katie’s. Katie’s cleaning and Tom is making drinks in the kitchen. Kristen starts talking about Jax and Brittany – she says that Jax sent her a weird message earlier in the day, and she thinks he’s going to propose to Brittany. Katie disagrees. Stassi bolts to the kitchen to “help Tom with the drinks” and I’m LOLing at the two of them freaking out that Katie and Kristen have caught on. Schwartz – “Their sixth sense is uncanny.”

Brittany & Jax are having dinner at Neptune’s Net in Malibu. Jax is super nervous, it’s really cute.

We flash back over to Stassi, Katie and Kristen, who are still discussing the supposed proposal. Stassi bugs out and tells them that Jax is proposing to Brittany – tonight!

Seeing the proposal was everything! We’ve seen Jax and Brittany go through so much together, and to see them persevere and endure the tough times to seeing this lovely, amazing, romantic moment is so wonderful. I am so happy for them. I genuinely believe people can change, and I do believe Jax has changed. I think Jax’s father passing hit him very hard, and made him reevaluate what was important in his life.

I’m thrilled for these two! “I’m engaged!”

Despite the drama with James, and the sadness surrounding Lisa’s brothers death, the episode overall was a happy one. I’m over the moon for Jax and Britt, and I’m loving that everyone is getting along. (I absolutely love that Lala is friends the Witches of WeHo, I love them!) I’m also so happy for Stassi – Beau seems so great, and she deserves the best.

I’m excited to see what’s to come this season!