Hey guys! I haven’t recapped in a while, just because life has been busy and I haven’t really had time. But I recently discovered Love After Lockup, and while this is easily one of the trashiest shows on television, it’s also reality tv gold. I’ve only seen the past four episodes, so I’m a little confused on certain things (mostly Amber & Vince) so bear with me! But I had to recap this since I was hooked after the first five minutes.

We start off with Lacey & Shane. They’re cake tasting, and we learn that their wedding is two weeks away. “We’ve only been together for a little while, but Shane & I have really good sex and I feel like he’s my soulmate.” That sounds promising, Lacey. Shane asks if John knows about the wedding – he doesn’t. Lacey lies to Shane after the cake tasting and says she’s going to go dress shopping, but she actually plans on meeting John because she wants him to take a paternity test to see if he’s her son Marlow’s father. She feels “guilty” for not telling Shane – why not tell him then? 🤔

Cheryl is meeting her sister, Lacy. Lacy works in a maximum security prison and is extremely weary about her sister’s relationship with Josh, who she hasn’t met yet. She begins to grill Cheryl about Josh, and it’s obvious that this meeting will most likely not go well.

Angela and Tony are “home” (@ Angela’s) and Angela wants answers about Michelle, the girl Tony cheated on her with. Tony says the night he went missing from the halfway house, he was with Michelle. “We went to play basketball.” Angela is like, “Tony, I saw the texts.” Tony comes clean and replies, “I went and got a hotel room with Michelle.” I think Tony is totally playing Angela and that Angela is completely delusional to think otherwise. In his confessional, Tony says he’s “addicted to women.” Eye roll – please. Tony tells Angela that Michelle was the only one, blah blah blah. Angela believes his every word and then they start kissing and the leather couch is making strange noises and I’m just super uncomfortable all around.

Lizzy & Daniel are officially engaged. Daniel doesn’t want to tell his mom, since she believed he was giving Lizzy a promise ring, NOT an engagement ring. They head home from their romantic night in the Parisian themed hotel, and when they arrive they realize Daniel’s entire family is there. They decide that they should just keep the news to themselves. Teresa wants to know how Lizzy liked the promise ring, and Daniel literally bites her head off. He then proceeds to just blurt out he’s engaged, and Teresa is shocked. She hugs Lizzy and says, “I hope this is what you want.” I was Team Teresa until she tells us she’s not sure Lizzy is good enough for her son. Ummm really?

Alex truly is such a piece of shit. Last episode, he left Glorietta at the restaurant, and we learn he never came home that night. We know he stayed at Kato’s, but Glorietta doesn’t know that. Alex goes to Glorietta’s work and picks right back up where he left off the night before. He wants to know why Glorietta loves him and wants to marry him. Honestly, nothing Glorietta says will be good enough. Alex is over this relationship and clearly has his ex, Juliana, on his mind. It’s so annoying to watch this though, because it’s like man up, Alex. Stop trying to turn it around on Glorietta and end it. Also, if he says that she wants to marry him for his tattoos and body one more time, I’m going to scream. He’s delusional, LMAO.

The entire Vince & Amber situation confuses me. So from what I’ve gathered, Amber, Puppy, and Amber’s mom all had a plan that Amber was going to use Vince for financial purposes? Question – who is Puppy? Just a friend? Anyway, Amber & Vince are heading to Amber’s family BBQ. Vince tells us in his confessional that he wants to “reignite the fire” between himself and Amber, and honestly, I feel kind of bad for him. Although there is something really off about him. Seeing Amber with her family actually made me a little bit emotional, though, and also normalized her more for me. Amber tells us that she can’t keep lying if she wants to move forward in life. Is she going to come clean to Vince?

Back over at Angela’s, we learn she bought Tony a motorcycle. (🤦🏼‍♀️) She tells him that if she sees a girl on the back of his bike she’s going to be pissed.

They go inside, and Angela tells Tony her sister is going to come over, and she can’t promise that her sister won’t question him. Tony begins to get annoyed that Angela keeps badgering him about the cheating. He tells Angela that she’s not appreciating the sacrifices he made by moving in with her. LMFAO is he serious? Finally, Tony’s true colors are showing. He tells us that he’s going to give this three months, but if Angela is still bringing up the cheating after that he’s out.

Cheryl & Lacy head to the restaurant to meet Josh. Josh is beyond rude, he barely even introduces himself to Lacy, clearly making a horrible first impression. Lacy grills Josh, and Cheryl gets upset. They argue, and Lacy leaves the restaurant. She’s totally over it and just wants to go home. Cheryl and Josh follow. We learn that Cheryl is a former drug user and stripper. She feels like she turned her life around and believes Josh has the ability to do the same. Lacy doesn’t want to hear it though. She thinks her sister is being pathetic and is “blinded by love.”

Lacey is heading over to John’s house. They’re being super flirty with each other when she gets there. She tells John the reason she’s there, and he’s totally fine with taking a paternity test. He says that he hopes Marlow is his son. John brings up Shane, but is making fun of him, calling him a “Backstreet Boy” and saying “He’s just a little kid.” (I mean, he’s not wrong about the second part – Shane is a baby.) Lacey gets annoyed and decides its time to leave. “I wish he could just be happy for me.” Lmao, really, Lacey? John walks Lacey to the car. John asks Lacey for a kiss, and she says no. She tells us that although she loves Shane, she is still attracted to John, and there will always be a connection. John tells Lacey not to marry Shane, and that she’s making a mistake.

And that’s how we end the episode. What’d you guys think!?

Until next week….