RHOBH: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO HURT ME?

Another week, more drama here in Beverly Hills. I didn’t blog last weeks episode, but I did watch it & I took notes. Life just got too crazy. I’m sure everyone’s already caught up, but if not, we learn that LVP didn’t show up to Camille’s Bridal Shower, and then she claimed she wasn’t invited, which was not true – Kyle has the receipts to prove it. We also learn that Camille literally compares herself to Brett Kavanaugh and has zero compassion for women, while Lois (Lisa Rinna’s badass 90 year old mother) was almost murdered by the Trailside Killer. It was intense.

This week, we start out with Kyle & Teddi, and their daughters, Portia & Slate. They’re going to Petite & Pretty (I have no idea what this is?) to do a photo shoot? Kyle and Teddi are chatting while Portia and Slate are getting their makeup done. Oh, I forgot to mention, Camille asked Kyle to be a bridesmaid last episode, and she said yes. Kyle gets a text from Camille, and it’s a picture of the bridesmaid dress – a pretty, navy, capped sleeve dress. Kyle’s not happy – “A cap sleeve is not my friend.” (I hear that, Kyle. 😂) They also talk about how Teddi has an RV, and the girls plan on going camping soon.

Over at Rinna’s, she’s FaceTiming with Erika, who’s on tour. She fills her in on LVP no showing to Camille’s Shower (EJ couldn’t make it because of the tour) and Erika replies, “The saga continues.”

Denise & Aaron are at the gym. (I love these two.) Denise fills Aaron in on how she plans on having lunch with LVP. She thinks a lot of miscommunication is going on, and she’s unsure if she should get involved or just stay the fuck out of it.

Dorit is at Kyle’s, and they’re talking about how they are planning on going to see Boy George at The Greek the following night. Kyle asks Dorit if she invited Lisa – she didn’t. Dorit feels like she should give Lisa space, since she clearly doesn’t want to talk to her right now. I mean, I get it. I wouldn’t have invited her either.

Meanwhile, LVP and Denise are having lunch together at Villa Blanca. Denise tells Lisa that the girls really do care about her, and Lisa says that her feelings are really hurt.

They cut back over to Kyle and Dorit – Kyle says that Denise was going to have lunch with LVP. Dorit thinks maybe Denise would be a good mediator, since she went through a lot of stuff with Charlie Sheen. “Did you just compare Lisa Vanderpump to Charlie Sheen?” Kyle asks. Then she adds,”They are both Virgos.”

Denise is trying to get Lisa to see her POV – she brings up what she went through when she was divorcing Charlie, and how she could’ve chosen to retreat but didn’t. LVP doesn’t want to hear it. “I can’t explain why I’ve chosen to retreat,” LVP tells Denise. Denise thinks it’s weird – if LVP didn’t do these things she’s being accused of, wouldn’t she want to repair the relationships and defend herself?

Kyle tells Dorit that friends call each other out. She says that Lisa always makes herself the victim and bolts whenever she hears something she doesn’t like.

Denise is still trying with LVP – she tells her, “Those women still love you.” LVP isn’t buying it. Denise extends an olive branch and invites LVP on the RV trip the girls are going on, but she declines.

It’s the night of The Boy George concert. This is the first time Camille has seen the ladies since the Kavanaugh argument. Camille feels as though Lisa Rinna was “extremely unfair” to her at dinner, but life is too short to hold a grudge.

Dorit learns that PK has talked to Ken, and they have plans to get lunch. PK doesn’t want to get into it all at the concert, so they drop it.

Teddi tells the girls she did reach out to LVP – she basically said that she knows that they’re not going to see eye to eye, but she wants them to just be able to move on and she wishes her well. She didn’t get a reply.

They briefly talk about LVP saying she wasn’t invited to Camille’s shower – and Camille pretending that she didn’t know Kyle did in fact invite her. Camille owns it, but Kyle is annoyed because she feels like Camille plays both sides of the fence.

The Ladies go backstage, and they get to meet Billy Idol, which Rinna is super excited about.

The girls (minus Denise – she had a family night at home with the girls and Aaron) all seem to be getting along and having fun at the concert. “Everybody’s getting along so well,” Camille observes. Lisa Rinna asks, “When’s the shoe gonna drop Camille?” Foreshadowing at its finest.

The concert is over, and everyone is hanging out backstage. Boy George is talking about how he called out someone in the audience for being on their phone, and Kyle says something along the lines of “I would be too scared to do that, people could kill you”, or something like that. PK chimes in, “You can’t even get on with your best friend, Kyle, so you could have issues.” Like wait, what?

Kyle is livid, and I honestly don’t blame her. PK’s comment is so random and completely caught me off guard. He seems totally annoyed with Kyle, which is odd. What would he be mad at Kyle about?

“PK, you’re in the same boat as me,” Kyle snaps back.

“Its a joke,” PK replies, with absolutely no sense of humor whatsoever.

Kyle says it’s not funny, and PK says it’s “British Humor” which honestly infuriates me.

“Kenny’s speaking to me,” PK also adds, which just sounds like he’s trying to irk Kyle.

“I’ve been defending you,” Kyle says. It sounds like she wants to add “because of the dog drama” but doesn’t. “I didn’t put you in this position, so when you say that, it’s an insult.” I totally agree with that.

Dorit is trying to defend PK but also have Kyle’s back, which isn’t working.

“You’re in the same boat as me,” Kyle repeats, annoyed. “I hate to burst your fucking bubble.”

PK isn’t backing down. “I’m not quite in the same boat as you.”

Lisa Rinna is finally like, “Let’s go.”

Kyle’s pissed, and Dorit is mad at PK. “I don’t care if it’s a joke, if you hurt someone’s feelings you say sorry.” PK literally doesn’t care at all, and refuses to talk about it any further.

The ladies all agree PK was a dick.

“Good luck trying to have sex with your wife tonight,” Kyle says as she stomps away. (Really Kyle? Good one. 🙄)

The ladies are now outside, getting ready to leave and hanging out outside the bus that brought them to the concert. Rinna thinks PK is trying to stir the pot. “One shit stirrer can call out another shit stirrer.” Lmao.

Kyle’s furious – but I can’t lie, I’m literally shocked when she says, “It’s all based on you and your wife giving up the fucking dog.”

Dorit comes out, and she tells Kyle that PK is comfortable with her, and that’s why he said what he said. (That makes no sense.)

Teddi chimes in, and Dorit literally loses her shit. She snaps at her that she just wants to have a conversation with Kyle for 30 seconds.

“The way that she just spoke to me is so inappropriate,” Teddi tells Kyle. Kyle tells her not to get upset, because it’s clear that she’s about to.

Camille, who never gets along with Dorit, is suddenly on her side, and tells us in a confessional that Teddi butts in too much and is a “know it all”. Really Camille? WTF?

Kyle tells Dorit that her fight with LVP is because of her and PK, which Dorit doesn’t want to hear. She says it’s about Kyle’s own personal experiences with LVP. “You’re wrong, Dorit,” Kyle says. “If I didn’t know the two of you, I would’ve defended her blindly like she wants me too.”

I get what Kyle is saying in a sense – she has stuck up for Dorit, which did cause a rift in her friendship with LVP. However, to blame it all on Dorit is kind of bullshit. You keep saying you need to be honest and tell the truth, so that’s what you’re doing, right Kyle? So it’s not really fair to blame Dorit for the fight.

We end the episode with Kyle saying, “Fuck you, PK. And that’s British humor.”

Thoughts on this week? I’m having a hard time putting my own thoughts into words, because I feel like I see everyone’s side. Something about Kyle is rubbing me the wrong way right now though. I can’t put my finger on it, but if I do, I’ll let you guys know.

Until next week…..

RHOBH: A WOLF IN CAMILLE’S CLOTHING

 

 

 

 

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We’re back where we left off – watching Kyle getting kicked out of Villa Rosa.  (Who knew that Goodbye Kyle would become such an iconic line!? LMAO.)

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Fast forward to 24 hours later, Kyle’s with most of the girls (minus Rinna & LVP) + Aaron (LOL).  Kyle is telling them what went down at Villa Rosa, and that she feels bad that she couldn’t say “Lisa Vanderpump would never do that.” (In reference to LVP leaking the Radar Online story about Dorit.)  Kyle wants to tell the truth and lay everything out on the table.  Camille feels like Lisa should’ve never said anything to TMZ; she should’ve walked away.  Kyle continues to fill the girls in – she says how upset Lisa became, and how Ken got involved, and then she was kicked out of their house. Everyone is shocked.  “That’s not friendship, that’s bullshit,” Erika tells the group.

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At Villa Rosa, Lisa and Ken are getting ready to have their kitchen redone, and Ken is rehashing what went down between his wife and Kyle also.  “She was after you,” Ken tells Lisa.  I’m still feeling for LVP this episode.  Her birthday was the week prior, and she has a birthday dinner planned at TomTom that night.  She didn’t want anything big – she felt like it wouldn’t feel right in lieu of her brothers death. Her kids gave her a locket for her birthday – inside there is a picture of Pandora, Max, Ken & Nanny Kay, which I thought was super sweet.

Lisa tells us that she’s taken a lot of crap from Kyle Richards over the years. We get a flashback of Kyle not remembering who Nanny Kay was.  (The producers are so shady, LMAO.)  LVP is definitely way more sensitive than people believe she is.

In regards to the kitchen, Lisa feels like there is a negative vibe (since it’s right where the fight went down) and she wants it gone.

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Kyle and Mauricio are on a date, and Kyle’s telling Mauricio that she hasn’t spoken to LVP, and she’s sad, and still loves her.

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We cut back over to Villa Rosa, and LVP is telling Ken – “I don’t want that kind of love!  Why would you love someone who you think is manipulative and preys on the weak?  I would detest them.”

We’re flashing back and forth between LVP & Ken and Kyle & Mauricio.  Mauricio is shocked at how Ken spoke to Kyle, he thinks it’s unacceptable.

Lisa addresses this with Ken, saying, “You were a bit strong with Kyle the other day.”  Ken replies, “I must admit, I was a bit strong.  But when she starts picking on you like that – I saw red.”

Mauricio tells Kyle, “You need to stand up for your friends, but at the end of the day you have to stay true to yourself.”  Kyle feels sad.

Meanwhile, while Kyle’s feeling sad, LVP is acting super passive-aggressive.  “I’m not gonna stand here and say what a fucking bitch she was – oh, just said it.” (Eye roll.) Lisa, you have a right to be mad.  Just own it.

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We’re at Dorit’s, and she’s telling Sadie (her assistant?) about PK’s diabetes, and I’m just like – can I please fast forward this? Like I almost got up to change my laundry during this scene, I don’t want to talk about this or hear about it.  Sorry, don’t care.  They’re making a smoothie that Dorit hopes PK will drink, and they can’t figure out how to use the blender.  Honestly, I wanted to make fun of Dorit and Sadie in this scene but I feel like I would be the same way.

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Denise, Rinna and Erika are trying Flying Yoga.  LOL @ Denise – “This is one of those weird LA classes.”

After the class, Rinna tells the girls to fill her in on what went down when they got drinks.  They tell her what happened and Rinna is shocked.  “This is a whole other level,” Rinna says.

Rinna is planning on throwing a get together for Denise because she just got married, but Erika can’t go because she’s going on tour.

Denise

Over at Denise’s, she’s putting up cameras because she wants to catch her daughter, Sami, sneaking out of the house.  (LMAO.)  Denise and Aaron talk about what happened when they went for drinks the other night, and Aaron says that he felt bad for Kyle.  Denise doesn’t want to get on LVP’s bad side.  She’s been nothing but lovely to her, but, “if she did do this, she plays dirty.”  Aaron tells Denise to just, “Speak your truth.”

DORITOS

I honestly tried to fast forward this scene and was unable to.  PK is literally Dorit’s third child.  They talk about how they’re not invited to LVP’s birthday.  Dorit’s confused because she “didn’t do anything wrong.”  (Seriously?  Yes you did.)

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Over at Beauty & Essex, Rinna and Teddi are the first to arrive.  Rinna tells Teddi that Denise is going to be coming a little bit later because she’s going to meet LVP first for her birthday.

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Rinna fills in Teddi on the latest drama – she apparently tweeted a birthday cupcake to LVP that had pills on it, and then texted her to tell her she meant no harm by it in case it got misconstrued.  Call me naïve, I believe Rinna right now.  Yes, we know LVP’s brother committed suicide, but do we know that he overdosed?  I don’t know that.  Lisa Rinna’s sister overdosed, she wouldn’t maliciously hurt LVP like that.  The pill thing has a been running joke with Rinna for years.  I truly don’t believe she was trying to intentionally  hurt LVP.

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It’s sad to see Kyle not a part of Lisa’s birthday celebration.  It’s weird.  Meanwhile, Denise arrives at TomTom at 6:30, and I’m beyond uncomfortable for her.  An hour goes by, then an hour and fifteen minutes – nothing.  Lisa shows up at 7:50, and then acts shocked when Denise gives her her present and says she can’t stay.  The plan was that they were going to have a drink together!  Denise is literally so sweet and chill.

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At Beauty & Essex, all of the girls have arrived except for Denise.  The ladies are talking about Camille’s wedding, and I think it’s so weird that Lisa Rinna is harping on the fact that Camille is inviting Dorit.  Like, she’s trying to keep the peace.

They talk about LVP’s birthday, and everyone is pissed that Denise got the invite but they did not.

Denise arrives, and I think it’s so nice that she didn’t really say anything about what happened.  She could’ve easily had come in saying how LVP was over an hour late and really stirred the pot, but she chose not to.  She didn’t indulge in the petty bullshit gossip. Dorit is still going on about her non-invite, and says, “Why is she upset with us?”  Rinna adds, “I don’t have any beef with her.”  Umm….WTF are you guys talking about!? Yes, you absolutely do.  I can’t.

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The ladies all cheer to Denise, and then to Camille as well.  Camille is drunk AF & is on a whole different level, shit talking everyone.

Next week is Camille’s shower.  I’m sure it will not be drama free – is anything ever drama free in Beverly Hills?

Until next week….

xo

RHOBH: SHOWDOWN AT VILLA ROSA

Typically, I like to recap the episodes, and then I’ll throw my own opinions in here and there. However, this episode was so explosive, and left so many of us wondering – who’s telling the truth?  So I think I’m going to do something a little bit different today.  I’m not going to recap the entire episode, but let’s discuss certain scenes that play into what’s to come.

We know from last episode, that Radar Online published a story about Dorit and how she betrayed LVP by giving the dog (Lucy) to a kill shelter, etc etc etc. We know Dorit was super upset by this, and she and PK both believe LVP is the one who leaked it.

Let’s fast forward. Teddi is hosting a spin class for charity – the proceeds will go to Vanderpump Dogs.  Normally a spin class is $20, however, they’re charging $60 for a good cause.  Teddi has had this event planned for a couple of months – originally planned with John Blizzard.  Apparently, John Blizzard was supposed to be at Cycle House at 10:00 AM to set up; Teddi gets a text from one of the girls who works at Cycle House who tells her no one from Vanderpump Dogs is there.  Teddi doesn’t really know what’s going on, for all she knows, maybe no one’s showing.  LVP was also supposed to be there – she wasn’t planning on actually spinning, but she was going to be there and play with the dogs, etc.

At 10:30, Lyndsey, a Vanderpump Dog’s employee, shows up. So no Blizzard, no Sessa, no LVP.  Given the circumstances, it makes total sense that Blizzard and Sessa would not go.  I can see how Teddi would find it odd that LVP doesn’t show – but the girls do not know that LVP is anxiously waiting to hear about the bill (Resolution 401?) being passed by congress.  This bill that Vanderpump Dogs has been working on with Congressman Alcee will condemn the dog meat trade.  Seeing that this is what LVP is doing, I see nothing wrong with her not going to Cycle House.  She kept her word as well, and Vanderpump Dogs did show up.

All of the girls show up to Cycle House (minus LVP). Rinna is the first one to bring up the Radar Online story.

“Someone leaked that,” she tells the group.

“Not someone,” Dorit adds.

“We know who, “ Rinna says matter of factly.

Clearly, the majority of the group agrees with this.

“What’re you trying to do?” Erika asks, in reference to LVP.

“I’m not going to let her bully me,” Dorit says.

Rinna says that what LVP did was “dirty”, and the girls agree.

Once the class is done, the girls all go to lunch at Fig & Olive, and they basically pick up right where they left off prior to spinning.   They talk about how neither John Blizzard or John Sessa showed up, and how LVP was also a no show.

“Lisa had another event,” Kyle tells the group.   Apparently, Kyle was invited to the event, and it was 11:00 AM- 5:00 PM. (Which, am I mistaken here, because I’m wondering why Kyle doesn’t tell them LVP is waiting on a huge bill to be passed by congress?? Did she tell them??? If she did, I don’t remember. )

“Why couldn’t she come to this first and then go to her thing?” Denise asks. Honestly, I think Denise is totally innocent in all of this bullshit.  She’s asking genuine questions because she doesn’t know.

“I have no idea,” Kyle replies. KYLE – why aren’t you saying what LVP is doing!?  LVP didn’t randomly plan an event at the same time the Cycle House event was going on.  She can’t control when and if a bill is going to be passed.  SHARE THIS WITH THE GIRLS.

“Cycle House is five minutes away from Vanderpump Dogs,” Teddi says, annoyed. “She could’ve shown up and said hi to people.”

“It’s very clever, because now she can say, ‘Oh darling, I couldn’t possibly have shown up! I had another event with the dogs!’” Rinna exclaims dramatically, mocking LVP.

I’m watching this, super annoyed that Kyle isn’t saying what she’s truly doing.

We cut to LVP watching TV, waiting to see what happens – and the bill passes! She’s thrilled, and I’m thrilled for her.

Back over at Fig & Olive, Dorit brings up the article.

“I know that Lisa sent that story.” Dorit – why are you so confident that LVP is the one who leaked it?

“We can never say who it is,” Kyle responds.

Dorit is adamant it’s Lisa, and the rest of the group (except Denise) seem to agree with her.

“She’s not here,” Kyle adds, trying to stick up for Lisa. (Sorry, not buying it, Kyle. You could’ve diffused this earlier on.)  “We all have very strong opinions about this, and it’s a bad situation to be in.”

“She chose not to be here,” Rinna retorts.

“It’s indefensible behavior, and you have everyone here telling the same story,” Erika adds.

Rinna feels like Kyle struggles between doing the right thing, and doing what LVP wants her to do. She finds their relationship weird.

The women continue talking about this article, and the more they discuss it, the more sure they are that LVP is 100% behind it. Why?  “Her wordage.”  She says “nipped.”  (That’s an English word.)  She says, “Poor creature.”  JESUS CHRIST ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  You guys, have you really underestimated LVP that much!?!?! This is way too obvious to have been LVP’s doing. How does no one see that?

Rinna goes on to tell us that LVP told her years ago how to plant or leak an article if she needed to. Okay, Rinna, let’s play Devils Advocate – doesn’t that mean it could, potentially, be you?

“You’re friends with her,” Denise says innocently, “Have you ever known her to leak stuff to the press?”

Kyle starts to tip toe around the answer, and then Dorit demands an answer. “Kyle, answer the question.”

Kyle basically says that she has zero proof, but has she thought that Lisa has leaked a story to the press before? Absolutely.  We get a flash back of Adrienne, when she accused Lisa of leaking a story to Radar Online.

Do I think LVP has leaked stories in the past to the press? YES. I absolutely do.  I don’t believe LVP is 100% innocent – I think she’s done some shady shit in the past.  I think she was going to set Teddi up and let her take the fall for outing Dorit.  She underestimated Teddi.  But I actually do not believe LVP is the one who leaked this particular story.  None of it’s making sense to me.

“Have you talked to LVP since the article came out?” Kyle asks Dorit.

Dorit is basically offended. “Why would I?”

I mean – why wouldn’t you? If I was in Dorit’s position, I would absolutely call LVP and ask her point blank if she leaked it.  I get it – they don’t think LVP is going to tell the truth.  But if that’s your good friend, why wouldn’t you confront her about it?

The girls basically all want Kyle to confront Lisa.

Another thing that’s confusing to me – Kyle thinks that this story would benefit Lisa and Vanerpump Dogs. I don’t see how that story would literally benefit anyone.  It makes everyone look bad.

Kyle does take one for the team, and heads over to Villa Rosa to confront LVP. Ugh, you guys, I hated this scene.  LVP is genuinely so excited to see Kyle – she’s over the moon that the bill passed, and she just wants to enjoy an afternoon with her friend.  Legit my heart hurts for her.  Kyle feels like she needs to be truthful and honest – and I get that, I do.  But you chose to confront her on camera – you don’t think that’s shady?  If I honestly believed my best friend was doing what LVP is accused of doing, I would never confront her on camera.  You’re doing that for a story line.

“The Radar Online thing came up. Dorit is very upset.  If you read the article, it sounds like it came from your camp.  I’m in a really bad position.”

LVP is instantly annoyed. “Why are you in a bad position?”

“Because as your friend, I want to say, that’s not true.”

“You think I’m going to go to Radar Online, give them a story, and then go to TMZ and refute that story?” (Apparently, TMZ approached Lisa after the Res 401 bill passed and asked her about the Lucy Lucy Apple Juice situation, and LVP stuck up for Dorit.)

“That’s what everyone thinks, yes,” Kyle says.

LVP is literally disgusted and shocked. They argue back and forth, and Kyle exclaims, “ You never let me talk!”

Kyle then goes on to say, “I’m here as your friend.”

Ken gets involved, and sticks up for Lisa. “You’re not her friend.”

“I will defend what’s right,” Kyle tells them.

“So you think I would give a story to Radar Online about Dorit?” Lisa asks Kyle.

“Yes,” Kyle answers, without even blinking.

“This changes everything.” LVP is furious, and clearly hurt. She tells Kyle to leave, and that she’s done with it all, and starts to head upstairs.

Ken starts in on Kyle, and although I understand he wants to stick up for his wife, it’s like back the fuck up Ken. You don’t get to get that close and aggressive toward any woman, ever.  And stop pointing your finger at her.  Lisa comes back down to get Ken, and her and Kyle start going at it again.

Lisa swears on her children’s lives, as well as Giggy’s, that she didn’t do it. She tells Kyle that she if swore on Farrah & Portia’s lives, she would believe her.  It’s telling that Kyle doesn’t believe her.

“Maybe you care more about your image than your friendships sometimes,” Kyle says.

LVP is 100% done at this point. So is Ken.  “Twelve years of friendship – done.”

We hear Ken yell, “GOODBYE KYLE!” from the top of the stairs, and then Kyle finally, reluctantly, leaves.

I literally had chills watching this scene play out. (I’m so dramatic, I know.)  But I have a lot of feels.  And honestly, I don’t think Lisa leaked this story.  I don’t think she would’ve gotten so upset if she had.  I know I said I do believe she’s leaked stories in the past, and I think Kyle knows that.  But I feel like Lisa was kind of looking at Kyle like, “I’m telling the truth this time!”

So if LVP didn’t leak the story (just hypothetically speaking, because we don’t know anything for a fact right now, and we may never know for sure) then who did?

Let’s talk conspiracy theories. (My favorite subject, LOL.) I don’t believe all of them, but they’re fun to go through.  So let’s do it.

•John Blizzard and/or John Sessa – this is my first guess. We all know how pissed John Sessa was about Lucy, I could absolutely see him or Blizzard going to Radar Online & bashing Dorit.

•Production – It would be so shady if production was behind this, but I wouldn’t be surprised at all. After all, their show thrives when it’s drama filled, and if they have no drama, I wouldn’t put it past production to create some.

•LVP – The most popular theory right now, and the most obvious. But doesn’t anyone else think it’s too obvious? Lisa is not dumb. I also think she already got Dorit back in the first episode, when her & Teddi were originally conspiring to take Dorit down. We saw Lucy onscreen, and we learned that Dorit had given the dog to someone, and had ended up in the shelter. We all knew. It was out there. There’s literally no reason for LVP to then go and talk to Radar Online to talk about Dorit some more. That’s not even LVP’s MO. I think Lisa likes to get back at people who wronged her – but I don’t think she would take it that far. Not when she already got what she wanted – the story to be out there.

•Kyle – I’m not sure how I feel about this theory, but it’s a good one. Apparently, people think Kyle is the culprit. She leaked the story, made sure it sounded like LVP, sat back and watched everyone blame LVP and played like she was conflicted about it, confronted her, accused her, took LVP down, and now she’ll be the new Queen Bee of BH. LMAO. I mean, this is so over the top. I don’t believe it, honestly. It’s too much.

•Lisa Rinna – The only reasoning I’ve heard behind this theory is that Rinna has been wanting to take down LVP for a while, since the whole Munchausen thing w/Yolanda. Still, I don’t buy it. I don’t think Rinna would ever do that to Dorit, for starters. And although Rinna is clearly enjoying this LVP take down, I still don’t think she’s the one who leaked the story.

•Erika – This is the least plausible theory to me. It literally makes no sense. I know Erika isn’t LVP’s biggest fan, but I don’t think she gives enough fucks to do this. Also, she’s grown close to Dorit, and again, I don’t think she would ever do that to her.

•Teddi – Worst theory ever. Teddi just openly admitted everything, and feels genuinely bad about it. I’m not even discussing this theory, it’s stupid.

•PK & Dorit – I mean, what the actual fuck? When people kept saying this, I was like, what would the motive be behind that? Everyone came back at me with one thing – MONEY. Still don’t buy it. Dorit’s broken up about it, and I don’t believe she would ever do something that could potentially put her children in harms way.

 

That’s all I’ve got – if I’ve missed any theories, please, send them my way! I’m tired of talking about this LOL.

Until next week….

RHOBH: EAT, DRINK AND BE MARRIED

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We start out with Erika & Mikey meeting up with the Pretty Mess Team to discuss Erika’s upcoming Pretty Mess Tour. They’re going over her set – they’re switching things up a bit, and they’re going to have multiple costume changes.  One of the outfits is basically an homage to that latex outfit Erika wore in Berlin (that flashback gives me life, LMAO.)  Erika is super excited, and I absolutely love seeing her in her element.

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Over at Haven & Co, Kyle, Dorit & Teddi are shopping for a wedding gift for Denise. They’re not sure what to get her.  Dorit tells us, “All I know is that she likes tequila.” LMAO.  Kyle’s disappointed that she’s going to miss the wedding – but not because she’s such a good friend, but because she can’t believe Denise managed to throw this together in 2 days, and she wants to see if it will be pulled off.  According to Kyle, this has “disaster” written all over it.  (I can feel myself turning on Kyle again, FYI.  I believe Lisa Rinna would call me a flip flopper.) Teddi tells us that her wedding was pretty low key, but still took 6 months to plan.  Of course Dorit had a lavish, over the top, Gatsby style wedding.  “We were living in LA, our wedding was going to be in NY, and our wedding planner was in London.”  Serious eye roll, stop it.

I know I said in past blogs that I saw a pattern with LVP, and while I do still see that, I’m also starting to see a pattern with Kyle.  Kyle seems to like this drama – why else is she constantly bringing LVP up? She tells Teddi that she’s going to see Lisa at Denise’s wedding – how does she feel about that?  Teddi’s not worried; she said her piece, and she feels like she and LVP can co-exist.  Kyle tells us in her confessional that she hates that her two good friends aren’t getting along.  (Why don’t I believe this?)  She says she tried getting LVP and Teddi to meet and talk, but neither of them were interested.  I mean….I would’ve believed Kyle if she hadn’t continuously filled Teddi’s ear with negative talk about LVP.  I don’t buy this.  I don’t understand why Kyle would have it out for LVP, but there’s something sketchy about this that I’m just not getting.

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Denise and Aaron are at Cypress Sea Cove, where they potentially hope to have their wedding. (Which is 2 days away, FYI, LMAO.)  They instantly fall in love, and they tell the coordinator that they’ll take it.  When he realizes how quickly they want to get married, his jaw drops.  I’m loving Denise you guys, she is seriously so friggen chill.

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Rinna’s in a hotel room, alone, and FaceTiming Denise. They’re talking about her wedding, and Rinna doesn’t think Denise is rushing into anything.  She talks about her own wedding with Harry Hamlin, and how they got married at their house, and everyone held a candle and the entire ceremony was lit by candlelight.  Rinna informs Denise she would not miss her wedding for the world, and she’s excited to see her.

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LVP & Ken are looking at kitchens – Lisa wants a new one; she hates her kitchen, she says it’s so dark and dreary and depressing. I am LOLing at LVP trying to sell the idea to Ken – a new kitchen would make her so happy and she needs to be surrounded by pretty, positive things.   It would also increase the value of the house, LMAO. A new kitchen is good for the soul.  Preach, Lisa.  The kitchen she’s looking at is absolutely gorgeous. She gets it.

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It’s the night before the wedding, and Denise doesn’t even have her dress yet, yet she’s still so chill and so calm. I legit aspire to be Denise Richards – her carefree attitude is so refreshing, I wish I could be this way.  I love that Denise invited Charlie – she invites him to anything involving the kids, which I think is wonderful co-parenting.  “Even if he brought a prostitute as his date, I wouldn’t care.”  DEAD, LMAO.  Denise does share with us that she’s sad her Mom won’t be there – her mom passed some years ago, and she wants to light a candle in honor of her.  Very sweet.  Aaron’s only qualm is that they didn’t tell her daughters sooner – Denise tells us in her confessional that she waited to tell the girls because she was afraid her teenage daughters would judge her, LOL.  Sami and Lola are both totally fine with it, and Eloise clearly loves Aaron.  Aaron is the absolute sweetest – when he gave the girls necklaces, I was basically crying.  I love this family.

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It’s the day of the wedding, and everyone is arriving. Erika & Rinna come together, and Erika is wearing one of Rinna’s QVC jumpers.  I love it, I think she looks so chic and simple, and pretty.  Rinna’s dress is a little bit crazy, but it’s totally her – floral print/leopard print mixture.  The girls are all looking pretty, but it’s clear to me there was no dress code for this event.  Everyone’s wearing totally different looks.  Teddi’s look is my favorite – I feel like she’s the most appropriately dressed for a beach wedding.

Teddi tells us she is not having any drama today. “I can ruin a 50th birthday party, but a wedding!?  Come on.”  LMAO.

Meanwhile, Denise is still at her house, late for her own wedding. But she literally doesn’t care and is just going with the flow and I love it.

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LVP arrives, and I’m honestly uncomfortable watching her make her rounds with the girls. Everyone is so fake in Beverly Hills.  Those double cheek kisses kill me.  I get it, it’s a wedding, and you’re all going to be polite and cordial, but it’s just so phony and gross.  LVP playfully smacks Rinna’s ass, and Rinna tells us that she “doesn’t have any beef with LVP right now” (that’s weird – you’ve been out to get her all season, but you have no beef with her?) and that “LVP is obsessed with her.”  Okay, I love Rinna, but come on – LVP is so far from obsessed with you.  It might be the other way around.

Teddi catches wind that it’s past 2:00 PM, and that’s when the ceremony was supposed to start. I’m actually LOLing at Dorit – “Denise, you’re on her radar.”  She calls Teddi the Punctuality Police.

At Denise’s house, she’s almost ready to go. One of her daughters can’t walk in her heels, and Denise is like, “Well, they’re Louboutin’s, so you have to figure it out.”  Her daughter asks if she can wear sneakers, and Denise is literally like, “Yeah, I don’t give a shit, wear whatever you want.”  I seriously love her.  Denise Richards is a breath of fresh air.

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Everyone at the wedding is freaking out that Denise is so late because they’re all sweating and melting, LMAO. Denise arrives shortly after, and everyone is totally relieved.

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I love love love this wedding. I totally feel Denise when she  says she doesn’t like being the center of attention, so she’s glad she’s walking down the aisle as a group.  Sami and Lola go first (and yes, one of them, sorry, can’t remember which one, is in fact, wearing sneakers) and then Aaron, Denise & Eloise walk down the aisle and I’m crying.

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Overall, the wedding is gorgeous. The ladies all got along, and Dorit feels like she and LVP are finally moving on and moving past all the dog drama.  LVP, however, does not feel the same way.  She was basically cordial because they were all at a wedding, but she actually feels like the girls owe her an apology, and she didn’t get one.

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The wedding is over, and Dorit and PK are at home, getting ready for bed. Dorit’s on her phone, and she gasps at what she sees.  There’s an article on Radar saying that LVP feels betrayed and stabbed in the back by friend Dorit Kemsley, after she dropped her dog off at a shelter.  Dorit is appalled – “This is untrue!”  She goes on to read more, and she’s convinced that Lisa is the one who leaked this story.  She knows that Lisa has a relationship with Radar, and the article mentions that Lucy was a Chihuahua Mix, and only LVP and her team knew that.  (I think anyone who saw the dog could have guessed Lucy’s breed, but that’s just my opinion.)  The article also states that Lucy “nipped” at Dorit’s children, and PK points out that “nipped” is an English word.  (We’re really reaching right now, you guys.)

While I do still believe Lisa set up Teddi to punish Dorit – I truly do not believe she leaked the article.  I think if anyone did, it was probably someone from Vanderpump Dogs – I’m guessing John Sessa.  I just don’t feel like LVP would need to.  The story was already out there, going to Radar would be so unnecessary, and way too obvious.  I do feel somewhat bad for Dorit – I don’t believe Dorit mistreated the dog, and I don’t believe she brought the animal to a kill shelter.  But at the end of the day, literally none of this would have happened if Dorit followed the protocol of Vanderpump Dogs and brought Lucy back to them.  End of story.  It was so refreshing to not talk about Puppy Gate for majority of the episode, that I can’t even get into this anymore right now.

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Next week looks explosive…it’s the scene we saw in the first episode, the massive fight between LVP and Kyle, when LVP kicks Kyle out of her house. (Literally all I can hear in my mind right now is Ronnie  & Ben’s voices from the podcast Watch What Crappens yelling, “GOODBYE, KYLE!” in their Ken voice.  If you don’t listen to them, you should.  Also, they’re selling merch right now that says “Goodbye Kyle” on it, and I feel like I need to go shop on their site.  Also, this is not an ad, I just truly love Watch What Crappens.)

Anyway….what do you guys think? Who leaked the story?

Until next week….

xo