RHOBH: THE SHOW MUST GO ON

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We start off at Camille’s – it’s one week until her wedding, and she’s trying on her wedding dress for the first time.  I absolutely love it, so perfect for a tropical wedding in Hawaii! She looks gorgeous.

We’re all around Beverly Hills now – LVP is showing off her new kitchen to John Sessa.  (Her new kitchen is phenomenal – but please get that thirsty ass dude off of my screen! I can’t stand John Sessa.  He’s on another level.)  Erika is doing an interview prior to her show later that night at The Globe.  Over at Dorit’s, she and PK are talking about the camping trip, and they’re annoying me.  “Nothing about us is RV Holidays.”  Like you guys didn’t go real camping.  You want to know what real camping is?  Sleeping in a tent that took you like seven hours to pitch, spiders and moths surrounding your tent so you freak out and sleep in the car, and then it torrentially downpours and you have to trudge a half a mile in the mud to the bathroom at 3:00 AM.  Try that for “camping” and get back to me.  EYE ROLL.

Kyle, Rinna and Teddi are working out – they’re running around Kyle’s property, and then they head to her home gym.  They need to work off the calories they ate while they were camping. (This is beyond annoying to me – you never even ate Kyle! Give me a break, lmao.)  The girls are half working out, half chatting.  They talk bout the camping trip, and Teddi and Camille’s mini feud gets brought up.  “She went from prostate, to calling me a know it all,” Teddi says.  “You know why she said it though?” Kyle asks.  “Because of the Boy George concert.”  Teddi doesn’t think she was being a know it all during that situation, she just was sticking up for her friend.  She also doesn’t think she was being a know it all during camping – why isn’t she allowed to have an opinion?  I said this last week, and I’ll say it again.  Sometimes Teddi carries on when she should drop it, but I really don’t think I would say she was a “know-it-all”.  That’s dramatic.  I also think she should be allowed to have an opinion during a group conversation.

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I love Aaron and Denise so much.  Denise is going to Florida for work for a few days (acting) and Aaron is basically holding fort.  Denise stops by Sami’s friends house, because Sami is going to the homecoming dance that night.  Denise gets emotional while saying goodbye because she hates that she’s missing seeing her off.  Denise is just so real and authentic with us, and I can’t get enough of her.  She’s such a great addition to the show.  I love her relationship with Aaron, and with her children.  They’re my favorites.

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It’s the night of the show, and the girls are all arriving to see Erika Jayne.  Rinna’s hair is literally giving me life – this look is absolutely fabulous.  I’m obsessed.

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Mid performance, the music cuts out, and Erika is fucking livid.  I don’t blame her.  She is such a badass though – I mean, she’s live, and like the title says, the show must go on.  She keeps going, and the music comes back.  She put on an amazing performance.

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After the show, the girls all go backstage to see her. We rarely get to see Tom and Erika together, and I loved this.  He’s so supportive, and she’s just beaming from his approval.  I love them.

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The girls are all drunk and silly.  Kyle gives Mauricio a lap dance, and then Edwin asks Teddi where his is.  Teddi says that she already gave him a lap dance yesterday, and he lasted two minutes.  Apparently, she gave him a lap dance to “Party in the USA” by Miley Cyrus, which Kyle and Dorit think is hilarious.

The next day, Kyle and Teddi take Portia and Slate with them for Mani/Pedi’s.  They talk about Camille’s wedding, and Kyle is freaking out because she doesn’t have her bridesmaid dress yet.  Teddi goes over the itinerary for the trip, and Kyle is just like “What?” She makes a joke that Camille should be grateful that Teddi’s a “know-it-all” because she actually does know the itinerary down pat for her weekend.

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Meanwhile, LVP calls up Camille and invites her over for tea, and she accepts.  Camille really wants Lisa to go to her wedding, but doesn’t want her to feel uncomfortable with the other ladies.  She asks her point blank if she’ll go, and Lisa declines.  She does apologize, but she just can’t be around the other women at this point.  Camille tells her that she gets it, but she wants to make it right between Lisa and the other ladies – especially Kyle. LVP is adamant that none of the girls are her friends.  “You don’t treat friends like that.  What do I have to do to prove I’m not lying, take a lie detector test?”

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Honestly, this scene annoyed me, because Camille is being super understanding to LVP’s face, but then she’s in her confessional saying a totally different thing.  “This is not the Lisa that I knew,” she tells us.  Camille feels as though Lisa is being a victim, and she’s never been one to play the victim.  According to Camille, LVP is acting like an immature girl hiding from the truth.  Ummm, that’s a little harsh, Camille.

Then we’re presented with a screen that reads: 24 HOURS LATER – and LVP is literally being hooked up to a lie detector test.  This is so fucking dramatic I can’t.  I mean, really?  I’m not even just saying this because I absolutely hate lie detector tests – they’re not real!  If they’re not admissible in court, they’re not accurate.  It’s just like, this is so over the top.

This was a total filler episode, but next week, we have Camille’s wedding.

Until then….

xo

RHOBH: GRILLING ME SOFTLY

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We’re back in Beverly Hills, but we’re not staying here for long – we’re going camping! (Except this is literally not camping at all, these bitches are basically staying in hotel rooms.  They should’ve said Glamping.)  But anyway.

We start off with all of the girls packing (well, over packing), but I truly have never related more to Rinna in my life when she’s like, “I want to be extra prepared.”  I totally get that.  I pack the same way, even if it’s just for a night.

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The girls are all meeting up at Teddi’s house, since she has the RV.  It’s initially pretty awkward between Kyle and Dorit, which is understandable given the events of last weeks episode.  We do learn that PK has texted Kyle, and she’s decided to let the whole thing go, but things are still weird between Kyle and Dorit.

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They load up the RV, and then they’re off. We stop at the grocery store first – have these women ever been to a grocery store before?  I’m LOLing at Rinna – “I love a market.”  It’s like mayhem; everyone is just grabbing things off the shelf and throwing it in the cart.  They spend $700 – you guys, you’re going for one night!!!  They arrive at camp and decide who’s going to be rooming with who.  I’m LOLing also at Erika – she looks at Rinna with her huge ass bag and is like, “What the fuck is in this bag?  A body?  Vanderpump?” Dead.

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After everyone settles in, Erika goes to get a massage (again, this is not “camping” – I’m sorry, I had no masseuse on hand when I went camping) and the rest of the girls play beer pong.  Dorit is literally the beer pong champ – who would’ve thought? The girls are all having fun though, and it’s a nice break to see.

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This is also not what my “tent” looked like while camping.  LOL.

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Teddi and Dorit win the beer pong game, and then the girls all sit down to chat/drink.  Denise asks Kyle if she regrets her conversation with Lisa and Ken.  She doesn’t regret it, but she does regret the outcome. Dorit chimes in, and says, “I don’t understand how it turned that she’s angry with me.”  Teddi replies, “She was originally angry at you, Dorit.  That’s what you’re missing.  It was a passive aggressive punishment.”  (Fact.)  Erika rejoins the group, back from her massage, and they fill her in on the conversation.  She basically could careless about LVP.  Dorit says LVP “drew a line in the sand” in regards to their friendship, and Erika basically shrugs.  “I care about the women at this table,” she tells us.  “If you wanna be an asshole, go be a fucking asshole.”  I couldn’t agree more Erika!

The next day, the girls all go “rock climbing.”  Nothing about this is interesting to me – except, did Camille just say she used to wear a strap on with Kelsey? The fuck!?

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Back at camp, they start grilling, and it’s literally a disaster. Camille has been making petty comments about Teddi this entire episode in her confessional, and she’s annoyed that Teddi said she was “fired” from grill duty.  Like Camille, grow up.  Once the food is ready, the girls all sit down to eat.  Denise leaves this time to get a massage, and the rest of the girls are eating and chatting.  Of course LVP is brought up.  Camille says that she wants her at her wedding, and Teddi tells her that she should actually call her if she wants her there.  Again, in Camille’s confessional, she says that Teddi is a “know-it-all” and that it’s “irritating.”  Why is Teddi not allowed to have an opinion on a group conversation?

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Denise is back, and they somehow get on the topic of massages having happy endings.  We learn that Denise has had one, and she said when she met Aaron he had never had one, so she took him to get one, and Rinna and Teddi’s face in the picture above is everyone’s literal reaction to this news.  I am dead, lmao.  I love when Erika chimes in and is like, “I don’t know any man who’s never fucked a hooker.  I mean, Tom never said he did, but he was a young man once.”  I am dying.

The girls are all sitting around the fire, and Denise and Dorit go off to get drinks.  Camille comments to Kyle that things between herself and Dorit seem better, and Kyle says that they are, and divulges the information that PK reached out to her.  I don’t agree with Camille calling Teddi a know-it-all, but I don’t think she should’ve said anything at this point about this particular situation.  “Things don’t fly out of your mouth that you’re not thinking.  I’m sorry.”  Rinna agrees with Teddi and says, “That’s true.”  Kyle pipes in, “He was drinking though,” to which Teddi responds, “It was deliberate, not malicious.”  Rinna, forever a shit stirrer, says, “Maybe it was malicious.  Who knows?”

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Dorit and Denise are back, and Dorit asks, “What’s malicious?”  When she learns they’re talking about PK, she is visibly frustrated, and  I don’t blame her.  Why are we rehashing this!? Like let’s drop it, it’s over and done with.  The girls move away from the fire and over to the picnic table, where their conversation continues.  Teddi admits that she thinks PK was trying to be a dick, basically, which hurts Dorit’s feelings.  I understand where Dorit is coming from, and I also feel like just because Teddi feels a certain way at times, doesn’t mean she always has to say it.  Sometimes it’s better to just keep your thoughts to yourself and keep peace within the group.

Camille is beyond annoyed at this point, and she’s coming for Teddi.  She’s being super condescending to her, but denies it.  “You said you know everything,” Camille tells Teddi.  Erika looks at them both, confused, and then asks Teddi, “Did you say you’re a know-it-all?”  Teddi is like, “I never said that.”  Camille replies, “I said that she was a know it all to Denise.”  They banter back and forth, and it’s honestly stupid.  Teddi calls out Camille for talking behind her back but never having the balls to say it to her face, and Camille’s like, “My face is right here.”  (Lmao, I cannot.)  Dorit’s feeling emotional between what happened with LVP and her prior conversation with Kyle a few nights earlier, and Kyle apologizes for that.  They seem fine, and Teddi and Camille drop their argument as well.  Camille just thinks Teddi inserts herself into conversations where she doesn’t belong.

The girls head to bed, and the next morning, they pack up and head home.  Erika invites them all to her show that’s at The Globe Theatre, and we exit the show with all of the girls singing, “Kumbaya” in the RV.

Not a crazy episode, but I enjoyed the girls getting along for the most part, and Erika Jayne eating pumpkin pie for breakfast literally gave me life.

Until next week….

xo

RHOBH: EAT, DRINK AND BE MARRIED

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We start out with Erika & Mikey meeting up with the Pretty Mess Team to discuss Erika’s upcoming Pretty Mess Tour. They’re going over her set – they’re switching things up a bit, and they’re going to have multiple costume changes.  One of the outfits is basically an homage to that latex outfit Erika wore in Berlin (that flashback gives me life, LMAO.)  Erika is super excited, and I absolutely love seeing her in her element.

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Over at Haven & Co, Kyle, Dorit & Teddi are shopping for a wedding gift for Denise. They’re not sure what to get her.  Dorit tells us, “All I know is that she likes tequila.” LMAO.  Kyle’s disappointed that she’s going to miss the wedding – but not because she’s such a good friend, but because she can’t believe Denise managed to throw this together in 2 days, and she wants to see if it will be pulled off.  According to Kyle, this has “disaster” written all over it.  (I can feel myself turning on Kyle again, FYI.  I believe Lisa Rinna would call me a flip flopper.) Teddi tells us that her wedding was pretty low key, but still took 6 months to plan.  Of course Dorit had a lavish, over the top, Gatsby style wedding.  “We were living in LA, our wedding was going to be in NY, and our wedding planner was in London.”  Serious eye roll, stop it.

I know I said in past blogs that I saw a pattern with LVP, and while I do still see that, I’m also starting to see a pattern with Kyle.  Kyle seems to like this drama – why else is she constantly bringing LVP up? She tells Teddi that she’s going to see Lisa at Denise’s wedding – how does she feel about that?  Teddi’s not worried; she said her piece, and she feels like she and LVP can co-exist.  Kyle tells us in her confessional that she hates that her two good friends aren’t getting along.  (Why don’t I believe this?)  She says she tried getting LVP and Teddi to meet and talk, but neither of them were interested.  I mean….I would’ve believed Kyle if she hadn’t continuously filled Teddi’s ear with negative talk about LVP.  I don’t buy this.  I don’t understand why Kyle would have it out for LVP, but there’s something sketchy about this that I’m just not getting.

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Denise and Aaron are at Cypress Sea Cove, where they potentially hope to have their wedding. (Which is 2 days away, FYI, LMAO.)  They instantly fall in love, and they tell the coordinator that they’ll take it.  When he realizes how quickly they want to get married, his jaw drops.  I’m loving Denise you guys, she is seriously so friggen chill.

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Rinna’s in a hotel room, alone, and FaceTiming Denise. They’re talking about her wedding, and Rinna doesn’t think Denise is rushing into anything.  She talks about her own wedding with Harry Hamlin, and how they got married at their house, and everyone held a candle and the entire ceremony was lit by candlelight.  Rinna informs Denise she would not miss her wedding for the world, and she’s excited to see her.

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LVP & Ken are looking at kitchens – Lisa wants a new one; she hates her kitchen, she says it’s so dark and dreary and depressing. I am LOLing at LVP trying to sell the idea to Ken – a new kitchen would make her so happy and she needs to be surrounded by pretty, positive things.   It would also increase the value of the house, LMAO. A new kitchen is good for the soul.  Preach, Lisa.  The kitchen she’s looking at is absolutely gorgeous. She gets it.

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It’s the night before the wedding, and Denise doesn’t even have her dress yet, yet she’s still so chill and so calm. I legit aspire to be Denise Richards – her carefree attitude is so refreshing, I wish I could be this way.  I love that Denise invited Charlie – she invites him to anything involving the kids, which I think is wonderful co-parenting.  “Even if he brought a prostitute as his date, I wouldn’t care.”  DEAD, LMAO.  Denise does share with us that she’s sad her Mom won’t be there – her mom passed some years ago, and she wants to light a candle in honor of her.  Very sweet.  Aaron’s only qualm is that they didn’t tell her daughters sooner – Denise tells us in her confessional that she waited to tell the girls because she was afraid her teenage daughters would judge her, LOL.  Sami and Lola are both totally fine with it, and Eloise clearly loves Aaron.  Aaron is the absolute sweetest – when he gave the girls necklaces, I was basically crying.  I love this family.

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It’s the day of the wedding, and everyone is arriving. Erika & Rinna come together, and Erika is wearing one of Rinna’s QVC jumpers.  I love it, I think she looks so chic and simple, and pretty.  Rinna’s dress is a little bit crazy, but it’s totally her – floral print/leopard print mixture.  The girls are all looking pretty, but it’s clear to me there was no dress code for this event.  Everyone’s wearing totally different looks.  Teddi’s look is my favorite – I feel like she’s the most appropriately dressed for a beach wedding.

Teddi tells us she is not having any drama today. “I can ruin a 50th birthday party, but a wedding!?  Come on.”  LMAO.

Meanwhile, Denise is still at her house, late for her own wedding. But she literally doesn’t care and is just going with the flow and I love it.

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LVP arrives, and I’m honestly uncomfortable watching her make her rounds with the girls. Everyone is so fake in Beverly Hills.  Those double cheek kisses kill me.  I get it, it’s a wedding, and you’re all going to be polite and cordial, but it’s just so phony and gross.  LVP playfully smacks Rinna’s ass, and Rinna tells us that she “doesn’t have any beef with LVP right now” (that’s weird – you’ve been out to get her all season, but you have no beef with her?) and that “LVP is obsessed with her.”  Okay, I love Rinna, but come on – LVP is so far from obsessed with you.  It might be the other way around.

Teddi catches wind that it’s past 2:00 PM, and that’s when the ceremony was supposed to start. I’m actually LOLing at Dorit – “Denise, you’re on her radar.”  She calls Teddi the Punctuality Police.

At Denise’s house, she’s almost ready to go. One of her daughters can’t walk in her heels, and Denise is like, “Well, they’re Louboutin’s, so you have to figure it out.”  Her daughter asks if she can wear sneakers, and Denise is literally like, “Yeah, I don’t give a shit, wear whatever you want.”  I seriously love her.  Denise Richards is a breath of fresh air.

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Everyone at the wedding is freaking out that Denise is so late because they’re all sweating and melting, LMAO. Denise arrives shortly after, and everyone is totally relieved.

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I love love love this wedding. I totally feel Denise when she  says she doesn’t like being the center of attention, so she’s glad she’s walking down the aisle as a group.  Sami and Lola go first (and yes, one of them, sorry, can’t remember which one, is in fact, wearing sneakers) and then Aaron, Denise & Eloise walk down the aisle and I’m crying.

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Overall, the wedding is gorgeous. The ladies all got along, and Dorit feels like she and LVP are finally moving on and moving past all the dog drama.  LVP, however, does not feel the same way.  She was basically cordial because they were all at a wedding, but she actually feels like the girls owe her an apology, and she didn’t get one.

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The wedding is over, and Dorit and PK are at home, getting ready for bed. Dorit’s on her phone, and she gasps at what she sees.  There’s an article on Radar saying that LVP feels betrayed and stabbed in the back by friend Dorit Kemsley, after she dropped her dog off at a shelter.  Dorit is appalled – “This is untrue!”  She goes on to read more, and she’s convinced that Lisa is the one who leaked this story.  She knows that Lisa has a relationship with Radar, and the article mentions that Lucy was a Chihuahua Mix, and only LVP and her team knew that.  (I think anyone who saw the dog could have guessed Lucy’s breed, but that’s just my opinion.)  The article also states that Lucy “nipped” at Dorit’s children, and PK points out that “nipped” is an English word.  (We’re really reaching right now, you guys.)

While I do still believe Lisa set up Teddi to punish Dorit – I truly do not believe she leaked the article.  I think if anyone did, it was probably someone from Vanderpump Dogs – I’m guessing John Sessa.  I just don’t feel like LVP would need to.  The story was already out there, going to Radar would be so unnecessary, and way too obvious.  I do feel somewhat bad for Dorit – I don’t believe Dorit mistreated the dog, and I don’t believe she brought the animal to a kill shelter.  But at the end of the day, literally none of this would have happened if Dorit followed the protocol of Vanderpump Dogs and brought Lucy back to them.  End of story.  It was so refreshing to not talk about Puppy Gate for majority of the episode, that I can’t even get into this anymore right now.

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Next week looks explosive…it’s the scene we saw in the first episode, the massive fight between LVP and Kyle, when LVP kicks Kyle out of her house. (Literally all I can hear in my mind right now is Ronnie  & Ben’s voices from the podcast Watch What Crappens yelling, “GOODBYE, KYLE!” in their Ken voice.  If you don’t listen to them, you should.  Also, they’re selling merch right now that says “Goodbye Kyle” on it, and I feel like I need to go shop on their site.  Also, this is not an ad, I just truly love Watch What Crappens.)

Anyway….what do you guys think? Who leaked the story?

Until next week….

xo

RHOBH: FIFTY SHADES OF SHADE

What an episode!  I’m so sick of Puppy Gate, but clearly, this is moving way beyond just an issue with Lucy Lucy Apple Juicy.  Shit’s going down.

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We start out with Kyle, who is at The Agency, visiting Mauricio.  (I’m obsessed with Kyle’s jacket.  Obsessed.)  Kyle is feeling better now that Sophia is officially at school.  She shares with Mauricio that she’s worried that American Women (her TV Show, the one that has caused friction with her sisters) is not going to be picked up for a second season, but she’s trying to stay positive.

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Say whatever you want about Dorit – she’s literally slaying.  Her body is giving me life.  She is beyond gorgeous – #GOALS.  JMG Magazine is shooting Dorit and Barbie Blank (why do I know her?) modeling Dorit’s swimwear line, Beverly Beach.  And they’re going to be on the cover.

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Dorit’s invited Erika to the shoot, because she feels like “if you want to push the boundaries”, Erika Jayne is the best one to get advice from.  I’m LOLing at Erika giving her two cents; “Guts in, tits up!”  “You’re selling ass, not cookies!” LMAO.

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Denise is over at LVP’s, and she brought her daughters, Lola & Eloise.  Denise states that she knows all of the other ladies have an issue with LVP, but LVP has been nothing but “warm, compassionate and lovely” to her.  She wants to make her own judgment.  That’s totally fair.

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Back at Dorit’s, once the shoot wraps up, Erika and Dorit are chatting.  Dorit fills Erika in on the conversation she had the day prior at LVP’s with Kyle – and all of the texts LVP shared.  Erika is surprised by this information, because this is different than what she has heard from Teddi.  Dorit tells Erika she still feels the same way – like LVP isn’t going to take ownership, and she doesn’t think this is all Teddi, though she realizes now that Teddi is not as innocent as she originally portrayed herself to be.  They both muse about what LVP’s endgame is – to make Dorit look bad?  It sure seems so.  Erika tells Dorit, “Don’t trust anyone.”

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Rinna is visiting Camille – she’s checking out the restaurant/venue she plans on having her 50th Birthday Bash at.  Rinna brings up the Bahamas and LVP, and Camille says, “We’ve all experienced the wrath of LVP.” I am literally dead at this clip of Camille calling out LVP for telling Camille to bring up Taylor and Russell (Season 2, which I just watched!)  Camille admits that Lisa did tell her to bring it up, and that Lisa has “a habit of keeping her hands clean.”  I mean, isn’t that obvious by now?  Everyone who is so Pro-LVP – she literally does this every single season.  It’s a pattern.  Camille also feels bad for LVP though – she’s going through a lot, and she’s having a tough time.  Honestly, I really love Camille.  I think she knows how LVP is, but she doesn’t care.  It’s kind of like – it is what it is.  Lisa’s always been this way, she’s not going to change now. Camille does bring up Dorit, though, and says that she is kind of phony.  Lisa Rinna thinks Camille is being “wishy-washy” because they got along just fine in the Bahamas.  “Did she really want a dog?” Camille asks.  “Or did she just want to be closer to Vanderpump.”  Rinna looks shocked, and Camille adds, “I know, I’m being catty.”

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Denise and Aaron are discussing their upcoming wedding – they seriously do plan on getting married on 9/8/18, and they cheers to “trying to put together a wedding in a week.”  They found a place in Malibu where they want to have it at, and it looked gorgeous.  I’m so weirdly attracted to Aaron right now, LMAO. I love how spontaneous these two are.

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Teddi is meeting with her therapist, Val.  She tells Val that she’s, “a mess today”, and she fills her in on what’s been going on.  She admits that she has anxiety because of it, and I think it’s written all over Teddi’s face that she got in way over her head.  She owns it all – she was in on the scheme, but she couldn’t go through with it.  She also shares with us that she was originally told a story about Lucy that wasn’t true.  Teddi believed Lucy had been locked in Dorit’s basement, and hadn’t seen the light of day for months, and then had been taken to a kill shelter.  (WTF?)

Honestly, I’m totally Team Teddi.  Trying to take someone down isn’t the right thing to do, but she’s owning it now, and she’s sorry for it.  She also didn’t even go through with it.  This is LVP’s M.O. – she uses whoever the newest/weakest person is to do her dirty work.  Seriously, please look back at prior seasons.  She’s close with Camille while Camille is going through a horrible divorce, and has Camille confront Taylor about the Russell situation, while she sits back and watches.  She was super close to Brandi, and screwed her over with the tabloid thing with Kyle and Mauricio (Mauricio was supposedly cheating.)  She became good friends with Lisa Rinna, only to put a bug in her ear that Yolanda Hadid had Munchausen Syndrome, and then pinned it all on Lisa.   And now she’s doing it to Teddi, so she can get back at Dorit.  Erika Jayne called it from the moment she met LVP – “Lisa Vanderpump is a sniper from the side.”

I like that Teddi’s therapist, Val, tells her, “It’s okay that a loose end isn’t going to be tied up.”  I feel like I needed to hear that advice.

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Over at Hart & The Hunter, Kyle and LVP are meeting up with Denise and Aaron for dinner.  We learn that American Women was not picked up for a second season, and although Kyle’s disappointed, she’s hoping she’ll be able to reconnect with her sisters.  Denise is being super silly during dinner, and she just keeps talking about how big Aaron’s penis is.  LMAO.  Denise fills them in on their plans for the wedding – Kyle can’t go, because she has a party at The Agency that night.  But all of the other girls plan on attending.

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It’s Camille’s birthday!  Her party is in full swing, and everyone looks fabulous.  I will say, though I usually love Rinna, she’s annoying me with her side comments on Camille and Dorit’s relationship.  She tells us in her confessional, “Flip-floppers are confusing.”  Like cut it out, Rinna.

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Teddi, Erika and Dorit are talking, and things are clearly awkward.  “Tell her,” Erika urges Dorit. Dorit, who also looks nervous, replies, “Now?”  Teddi is anxious, and asks, “Tell me what? Just tell me now.”  Dorit calls Teddi out – she goes over everything she learned at Vanderpump’s.  The three of them go out onto the patio to talk more.

Erika tells Teddi, “It sounded shady.”  Teddi explains the entire story, including her part in it.  Erika sees Kyle and LVP heading into the party, and says, “Guys, here she comes.”  Teddi and Dorit continue to talk, despite knowing LVP is close by.  “I was set up,” Teddi confesses.  “I took the bait, but I couldn’t go through with it.”

Kyle knows something is going on, but she’s not getting into it right now.  “There’s something going down, but I’m just going to mosey on by.”

Teddi apologizes to Dorit – she truly is sorry.  She felt like LVP was there for her the year before, when she was struggling to fit in with the girls.  Erika chimes in, and says, “She feels used. She’s accepting responsibility.”  Dorit respects this.  She wants to move on, and she appreciates Teddi’s apology.  Now she wants LVP to own it.

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Rinna & Kyle join the girls, and Teddi fills them in on what’s going on.  Denise joins the group, because she wants the girls to come back inside.  LVP is soon outside as well.

“We’re talking about the other day,” Kyle tells LVP.

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“I want to move on from it,” LVP informs the group.  “It’s all clear to me.”

“What’s clear to you?” Teddi is livid.

“You’re guilty by omission,” LVP says, as if she honestly doesn’t have anything to do with this debacle. “I saw the texts, I was shocked.”

I’m literally screaming at my TV at this point – are you fucking kidding me?  GTFO.  I cannot.  Teddi questions Lisa – how did she know that she knew? Lisa backtracks at this and contradicts herself.  She says she didn’t know that Teddi knew – but then she says of course she knew Teddi knew.  Which one is it?

Kyle tells us in her confessional, “It’s very clear to me Lisa Vanderpump wanted Teddi to know about the dog.”  Rinna tells us, “All roads lead back to LVP.”  Sorry LVP, everyone seems to be onto you.

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Teddi takes complete ownership.  She tells LVP that she knows she will never own it, but at the end of the day, Teddi told the truth, and if LVP can live with herself, then that’s fine – “it’s been working for you for a long time,” she adds.  (Everyone is so shocked right now.  Yaaassss Teddi!)

LVP has the audacity to ask, “You don’t feel any guilt or remorse?”  “Not to you,” Teddi snaps.  “I feel betrayed by you.”  “I feel betrayed by you,” LVP retorts.  “Oh, cause I couldn’t carry out your plan?  Sorry.”  Teddi is done.

Dorit tells us, “The truth will always set you free.”

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Back inside, the girls all sing Happy Birthday to Camille, and it’s as if the past twenty minutes never occurred, LOL.  (Only in Beverly Hills.)  The girls seem to enjoy the rest of the night – Kyle’s wasted, and Rinna’s encouraging her to do splits.  LMAO.  Typical.

The night is coming to an end……and so are some friendships.

What’d you guys think? Until next week…..

xo