RHONY: SHARK BAIT

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We start off with Dale & Tinsley – they’re going to Sobel, so Tinsley can get Botox for her TMJ. Tinsley tells us about the “Strut Your Mutt” Event, which is a fashion show for dogs that she’s hosting.  It raises awareness for animal rescue/adoption, and I think it’s a super cute idea.  (Also, I really want Botox.  Just throwing that out there, LOL.)

Sonja & Ramona are going for a walk, and they’re just chatting about everything. Ramona fills Sonja in on her blind date, and I’m dying.  “Well he speaks three languages and is very worldly,” Ramona tells Sonja.  “So he’s not good looking?” Sonja asks.  LMAO.  Ramona tells Sonja she wasn’t interested, and that she’ll admit she’s “into hot sex”.  Sonja calls Ramona the “Date Monster” – these ladies literally kill me.  They talk about Dorinda and Luann’s lunch, and they’re both happy that they seem like they’re in a good place.  They both also feel as though Dorin is in a very good place.  We learn that they’re all going to the Berkshires (@ Dorinda’s), and the Berkshire Flashbacks are giving me life.

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Over at Bethenny’s, she’s packing – she’s going to visit the guy she’s been seeing/dating in Boston. She also has a grief counselor coming over.  She doesn’t want to transfer her grief from Dennis to her new relationship.

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Honestly, this scene with Bethenny and the Grief Counselor broke my heart. Anyone who is questioning the timeline between the new guy and Dennis, I want to tell them to just shut the fuck up.  I’m pretty sure this therapy session literally explains it all.  We learn that a week before Dennis passed,  Bethenny had wanted out of the relationship.  She said that their relationship wasn’t healthy.  Yes, she loved him, but it wasn’t working.  Dennis told Bethenny he didn’t want to be in another relationship if he couldn’t be with her.  She’s carrying around guilt because of this.  When they talk about the fact that Dennis overdosed – how it’s so sudden, and how it is different than if someone dies of cancer, because it’s unexpected; one minute they’re here, and the next minute they’re gone – it truly hit very close to home for me.  I have the chills watching this – I’m sending Bethenny all of the love and prayers.  I pray for happiness for her.  I liked when the counselor told her “there is no road map for grief”, because he is absolutely right.  Regardless if Bethenny and Dennis were together or not at the time of his passing, at the end of the day, he was her person.  And my heart literally broke for her.

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It’s the day of the Strut Your Mutt event. Dorinda is first to arrive – we learn that she’s going to walk down the runway with Matilda, a cute little dog who’s 10 and has yet to be adopted.  We also learn that Dorinda’s dog, Lucy, recently passed.  She was fifteen.  When Dorinda tells us about the dream she had – she said it was so vivid and Richard was sitting on the couch, and she saw Lucy’s face, and felt like “She’s home.” (I’m crying right now TBH.)

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All of the girls are arriving. (Anyone notice Ramona totally pretend not to notice Dale? LMAO. )  The girls are all chatting, and Dorinda tell Lu she’s so happy that she’s coming to the Berkshires.  “I’m coming for my house upstate,” Lu responds haughtily.  Jesus Luann, can you not be a bitch for like 30 seconds?  Why is she so bitter?  Despite the fact that Dorinda and Barbara had an argument, Dorinda did still extend an invite to her.  Lu tells us that Barbara filled her in on her fight with Dorinda, and this is so annoying to watch.  Barbara, you’re such a shit stirrer.  Dorinda tells the girls she got a naked chef (mostly for Sonja, LMAO) and then I’m literally dead when Lu is like, “Can we get a yoga instructor?”  Dorinda agrees that she can, and I’m just like….WTF?

The dogs are all ready to take the runway, and I’m dying when Tinsley’s assistant, or whoever that girl is who is helping out with the fashion show turns to Tinsley and says, “Your mom wanted me to tell you you need lipgloss.” LMAO Dale, back off.

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Ramona thinks she’s ready to walk the runway this time around – and I’m crying laughing at the 2009 Runway Ramona flashback. OMG! Her bug eyes are everything.

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The Fashion Show goes very well, and it’s really cute. Sonja walks down with her dog, Marley; Dorinda walks down with Matilda; Ramona walks with her dog, Coco; and Dale walks down with Tinsley’s dog, Bambi.

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All of the girls are going out on a boat for the day except for Dorinda; she’s going to the Berkshires early so she can decorate. (Dorinda’s so cute!)  I think the owner of the boat was a friend of Ramona’s, and they’re just going out for the day.  Lu is being awful.  She freaks out over a glass of wine being in front of her.  (I mean, I get it, she’s a recovering alcoholic.  I just feel like she’s exaggerating everything right now.)  The girls basically interrogate Tinsley and her relationship with Scott – I think they mean well, but can we just leave Tinsley alone?  I did like that Bethenny really talked Tinsley up – I would never guess in a million years that Tinsley has body issues.  She’s so gorgeous, and she has such a great body! That was shocking to me.  But I thought it was super sweet of Bethenny to boost her confidence like that.

 

We’re in the Berkshires! I’ve never met Dorinda’s sister, Melinda, before this episode. (We do see a flashback of when Melinda was Santa one year, LOL.)  I knew that Dorinda had a home in Great Barrington, MA, but I had no idea she grew up there!  Great Barrington is at least a few hours from me, but we’re in the same state! I was fascinated by this LMAO.

Dorinda went all out decorating, and I love it. (I’m a huge Halloween fan myself, it’s my favorite time of the year.)  Tinsley, Ramona and Sonja are the first to arrive.  They’re all freaking out over the decorations, and Ramona points to skeleton like creature crying in the fetal position and says, “It looks like Bethenny crying!” LMFAO, Ramona. I can’t.

They’re all discussing the room situation inside the house, and Ramona picks up a sign that says “Good Vibes Only” and is literally putting it in everyone’s face and telling them that’s the theme for the weekend. (Ramona is so much work LMAO.) Dorinda promised Bethenny Hannah’s room; apparently that’s the best room.  Dorinda is giving that room to Bethenny because she has been going through a hard time and she wants her to be comfortable.  Dorinda plans on giving Lu the Moroccan Room, but Tinsley doesn’t want the Fish Room, so she’s like, “Fine, you can have the Moroccan Room and Lu can have the Fish Room.” (HONESTLY WHY DOES THIS MATTER!?)

The girls head out to The Wheatleigh Hotel for Dinner, and Lu meets them there. I die a little bit again when Lu asks Dorinda if she can get her a masseuse.  Luann, this is NOT a hotel.  Like what?  Dorinda agrees; she’s truly going above and beyond to accommodate Lu and make her happy.  The girls ask Dorinda what’s going on with Barbara, and she says that they’re fine.   Dorinda gets up to go to the bathroom, and when she’s gone, the room situation comes up once more.  “If I’m in the Fish Room I’m going to freak out,” Luann tells the group, to which Ramona and Sonja completely lose their shit and think this is the funniest thing ever. Dorinda comes back, and Lu immediately is like, “Why am I in the Fish Room?” Dorinda’s like, “I didn’t know you didn’t like the Fish Room.”  Luann goes off, and she’s pissed that Bethenny gets Hannah’s room – she thinks that Dorinda should’ve specifically given that room to her.  Tinsley speaks up, and is like, “She was going to give you the Moroccan Room because I didn’t want the Fish Room!” But this doesn’t placate Lu, she still thinks Dorinda should’ve given her the best room.

I am literally DEAD. I cannot get over the entitlement Lu feels like she has.  Luann, you sound like a spoiled little bitch.  Are you kidding me?  Honestly, Dorinda truly handled herself perfectly, because I would’ve lost my shit and told Lu to just leave.  The entire situation is beyond rude.  I couldn’t even imagine ever acting that way while being invited to stay at a friends home.  No class, no manners!

What’d you guys think? Do you think Luann should have the best room, or just be grateful that she has a room at all?

Until next week…..

RHONY: MAKING UP IS HARD TO DO

We are back where we left off last week – at Sonja’s Paper Magazine Party, where Dorinda and Luann are about to come face to face. It’s super awkward, I agree with Bethenny; the tension is visible. Dorinda tells Lu she would like to talk to her, but Lu doesn’t want to talk tonight. Dorinda agrees that that’s fine, and after some surface level chitchat Luann goes back to where she was sitting with Barbara and the other girls.

I love that Bethenny is being super supportive of Dorinda, and she’s also seeing that Lu is acting entitled. Bethenny thinks that Lu feels as though she has the upper hand. Barbara asks Lu how it went, and she says that she just didn’t want to talk tonight. Why do I get the sense that Barbara is glad Luann and Dorinda didn’t make up? 🤔

Sonja is going around saying who looks “fuckable” and apparently, Tinsley looks unfuckable. (Barbara is fuckable, but Tinsley isn’t? You lost me there.) I honestly think Sonja is just jealous of Tinsley because she’s a younger, hotter version of herself. Sonja then tells us that she thinks Barbara swings both ways, and not just because “she looks kind of butch.” (OMG Sonja, nooooo!! 🤦🏼‍♀️) Tinsley joins them, and she tells us, “Sitting next to these hoe bags, anyone is gonna look unfuckable.” I can’t with these women.

Dorinda is leaving, and she tells us she’s going to be “Open, warm and welcoming” and hopefully will be able to break Luann’s walls down.

Ramona’s also getting ready to leave, and she uses this opportunity to give Bethenny her condolences. Bethenny and Ramona have such a strange relationship, but there is a genuine understanding between them.

Wtf was with that conversation between Lu and Ramona? Honestly, I feel like I shouldn’t say what I’m about to say – but I’m going to. Lu doesn’t seem sober to me. Her behavior is bizarre.

Out of the blue, some random girl asks Sonja if she can come kiss her. Sonja’s like, “This is a hot girl!” And they literally just start making out. I’m LOLing at Bethenny – “Who is that girl? It’s a drive by lesbian moment.” 😂

Its a new day, and we’re with Lu, who has to do fifty hours of community service. (Lu is still on probation.) She tells us that she loves community service – and then we see a flashback of Lu telling a 10 year old that losing weight is an easy part of modeling. 🤦🏼‍♀️

Over at The Marmara, Tinsley and Dale are having a drink. Tinsley notices Dale’s shoes, and she’s like, “These are Tabitha Simmons shoes.” (Tabitha Simmons is Toppers wife, Tinsley’s ex-husband.) Dale says she knows, and she loves her stuff. Dale goes on to say that Topper has the most beautiful baby she’s ever seen in her life. OMG, Dale is so much work. Way to rub it in.

Sonja rented out her townhouse for the summer, and she’s discovered a leak that ended up getting all over her curtains. Dorinda comes over, and she tells us that even when the ladies have their issues with John, “he’s a saint when it comes to dry cleaning.” LMAO.

Dorinda also tells Sonja she’s ready to move, too. She wants to start fresh. She saw an apartment in Sutton Place that she loved instantly and gave her “London-y vibes.”

Ramona is on a date with a guy named Marc, who her matchmaker set her up with. I’m dying when Ramona tells us she doesn’t know which way to swipe, so Rory is basically Ramona’s real life tinder.

Ramona tells us that “Marc is no red scarf guy, but he’s educated, worldly and successful, so I’ll give it a shot.”

Not only is Marc not meeting Ramona’s criteria, he’s literally the opposite of everything she’s looking for. Red flags are all over the place on this date. “I’ve almost been married eight times.” “Can I give you my philosophy on marriage?” LMFAO, Ramona is literally like, “No.” “I’ll tell you anyway.” 😂😂 I think it’s safe to say that there will be no second date.

We’re in Little Italy, and Bethenny set up a lunch between Ramona and Luann, so they can work things out. Bethenny joins them, as does Barbara. Bethenny hopes that either Dorinda or Luann will just “cop to something” and that hopefully they can move on.

Lu definitely has a wall up. Dorinda is making nice, but Lu is totally icing her out. I will say, I am dying when they talk about how Lu got a new house, and it’s round. Dorinda’s like, “That keeps the devil out.” And Lu agrees it’s good Feng Shui. Bethenny is just looking at them like WTF. “These two bitches are whacked.”

Dorinda is the first one to break the ice. “I love you, I hope we can work this out. I thought we were on a good path. I care for you, and even if we can’t be friends right now I want us to have peace about it.” Luann is still being kinda bitchy, but she agrees that she just wants to move forward as well. Bethenny chimes in and says that no relationship is perfect and that everyone makes mistakes. Lu brings up the past, and some of the not so nice things Dorinda has said to her. We get a flashback of a dinner where Dorinda and Lu argue, and Dorinda makes a comment about Lu being arrested. “I apologized, we were good after that.” Luann agrees, but adds, “Then the Cabaret thing happened.”

Dorinda expresses that she was hurt that John hadn’t been invited, but Lu stops her, because she doesn’t want to rehash it. Bethenny chimes in, and she just wants Dorinda to admit that she heckled the Jovani. “I didn’t heckle the Jovani.” LMFAO. Dorinda doesn’t apologize, but it seems like it’s because she thought that they had both moved past this. Barbara thinks Dorinda is her own worst enemy. (I’m not liking Barb you guys.) Dorinda and Lu end up calling a truce. I don’t think they’re going to be BFFs any time soon, but they seem like they can be cordial, and I think at this point this is the best we can hope for.

We’re at Dorinda’s apartment in the Upper East Side. Her real estate agent, Laurie, comes by, and we learn that Dorinda plans on listing the apartment at a certain price, and if she doesn’t get that price she’ll just rent it out. I am dying when Dorinda describes Laurie. “A true New Yorker and a bit of a broad.” LMAO.

Over at The Mondrian, Dale, Tinsley and Sonja are having drinks. OMG, this is the worst trio ever. Basically Sonja and Dale gang up on Tinsley for being with Scott. I can’t stand the way Sonja talks to Tinsley. She tells her that she doesn’t value herself enough (or something like that) and Tinsley’s like, “First I’m unfuckable and now I don’t value myself enough. Which one is it?”

Back over at Dorinda’s, Barbara comes over to give her advice on the apartment. She tells Barbara her plan, and then they sit down and Barbara brings up the lunch.

“Lu was surprised you wouldn’t budge with an apology.” Okay, I have so many problems with this. Barbara, they called a fucking truce – why are you stirring the pot!? This immediately sets Dorinda off, and she says she feels sorry for Lu because she’s constantly victimizing herself and making Dorinda out to be the villain. Dorinda is also like, “I felt great leaving that lunch.” Barbara tells her that Luann expected an apology, and it sounds like she feels the same way. Dorinda is growing more and more upset – she starts crying. “You drank that kool aid.” (LMFAO. God I love Dorinda.)

Dorinda tells us that she doesn’t think Barbara wants her and Luann to move forward, and I think she’s absolutely right. Barbara likes being Lu’s number one and go to right now.

Dorinda literally tells Barbara to get out of her house, and I don’t blame her. Barbara is not a good friend to Dorinda – she’s clearly Team Luann. Why does she bother pretending with Dorinda? Honestly Barbara is toxic.

And that brings us to the end of the episode. Nothing crazy has really happened this season yet, but I am truly enjoying every minute of it. These ladies crack me up.

Until next week….

RHONY: IT’S A CLAM SHAME

 

We pick back up at Barbara’s Clambake, where Lu is shocked to see Ramona stroll out behind Sonja.  “I was not expecting Ramona,” Barbara tells the girls.  Bethenny tells us Ramona will probably put clams in her purse for later – LMAO, she’s actually not that far off.

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Ramona can seriously be so awful, but it’s almost funny because I truly think she lacks the self awareness of just how cruel can she be.  She tells us that she met Barbara around ten years ago, but she’s “not really my kind of girl” – she’s not a girl’s girl, she’s masculine.  LMAO, like that’s so rude.  I can’t.

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The Clambake is the first time Tinsley has seen Bethenny since Dennis passed, and she gives her condolences to her.  Bethenny is wearing an engagement ring – we learn that Dennis had proposed to B, and although she didn’t actually say yes, she didn’t say no, either.  She tells us that her engagement with Dennis was “on ice.”  She’s been wearing the ring because she feels like Dennis would want her to.  I think she should wear it if it makes her feel happy.  She probably feels closer to Dennis wearing it.

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Once Ramona approaches, Lu immediately comes for her.  “Ramona, let’s cut to the chase.”  I feel like in Ramona’s mind, she was probably like, “OMG, it’s only been ten minutes, we can’t do this until the 30 minute mark!” LMAO.  “Another time,” Ramona replies, and casually strolls away.

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Ramona quickly moves away, and begins chatting with Barbara and Sonja.  “Look at her reporting to Barbara,” Lu snickers.  Ramona is pleading her case to Barbara, and basically sticking up for Ramona, but this is all a little bit too much.  Ramona’s kind of playing it like she’s a saint, and Barbara isn’t here for that.  “You spread lies about her.”

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“What lies?” Ramona asks innocently.  Barbara tells her, “You said she got kicked out of Chris Birch’s party, and that wasn’t true, I was with her.”  Ramona goes on to say something went down at some hotel after, but I don’t really know, nor do I care.  This is stupid.

Sonja asks Ramona if she’s given her condolences to Bethenny about Dennis, and she says yes.  Sonja’s like, “You did?” And Ramona says, “Through text, yeah.”  “No, I mean today, in person,” Sonja replies.  Ramona refuses to say anything to Bethenny in person today, because in Bethenny’s eyes Ramona is always doing something wrong.

Back over with Bethenny, Lu, and Tinsley, B is filling us in on a guy she is going to go out on a date with.  It’s just dinner, and she feels like it’s kind of soon, but I understand her wanting to be preoccupied and keeping her mind busy.

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Ramona and Sonja join them, and they’re saying their goodbyes. “You just got here,” Bethenny says.  They tell the girls that they feel bad for Dorinda, so they’re going home early.  Barbara told them to take some food back for Dorinda, and I’m dying because Sonja and Ramona are literally filling up bags worth of lobster.  Tinsley is mortified.  Lu is being such a bitch though, and saying that no one can take the lobster.  This is not your clambake, Luann.  Quiet down.

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Once the girls have gone, Bethenny mocks Ramona and her “Crazy Eyes.”  “Who leaves someone’s house with multiple lobsters?” LMAO, I mean, she has a point.  So tacky.

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The Brunette’s enjoy the rest of the clambake.  Lu, Bethenny and Barbara all end up in the pool, and they’re having fun.

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Back at Ramona’s, Dorinda is surprised at how early the girls are home.  (LMAO, I am Dorinda.  “I thought I’d watch some Law & Order.”)  They rehash the clambake.  Luann has been insinuating that Dorinda has a problem and needs rehab. I was glad that Tinsley noticed that Lu was definitely the aggressor in this situation.

“Dorinda, she’s still hurt!” Sonja cries.  “I’m still hurt!” Dorinda exclaims in return.  They’re all talking over each other, and somehow Bethenny and Dennis get brought up – something about Dennis helping someone with money, and how he’s smart.

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OMG, Ramona can literally be so crude and disgusting.  I am appalled at what comes out of her mouth.  “How smart can Dennis be? I mean, he was on drugs.”

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I think all of us are Sonja in that moment.  I honestly don’t even want to talk about this, because I have zero tolerance for anyone who talks poorly about someone who has a drug problem.  That was a truly repulsive thing for Ramona to say, and I’m not even going there.  Tinsley shuts it down real fast, and Sonja is pissed.
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Back in the city, Bethenny is on her way to the Carolina’s because they were hit by a hurricane.  I love Bethenny’s desire to help people, it’s truly admirable.  She uses her platform for good, and it’s such a nice thing to see.  I loved watching her interact with the people at the shelter – these people are struggling so much, and they’re beyond grateful for the help Bethenny is providing.

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Dorinda meets Barbara at Sarabeth’s for lunch.  Dorinda had reached out to Barbara, because she wanted her to hear her side of the story, not just Lu’s.  Dorinda wants to see Lu without outside forces around.  I agree, I think that’s probably the best way for them to resolve their issues.

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Sonja’s photos from her Paper Magazine party are literally giving me life.  She’s killing it.  I agree with Bethenny – “She looks like a Tom Ford ad.”

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They girls all look so gorgeous, but I’m obsessed with Sonja and Dorinda in their leopard print.  “Leopard makes you feel powerful.”  PREACH Dorinda!

Everyone is here, and I’m LOLing that Sonja invited her psychic.  Tinsley brought Dale, her mom, with her, and we seriously need a spinoff with like, Dale, Mama Dee, Patricia from Southern Charm…OMG that would be epic. Anyway.

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Bethenny and Dorinda are having a nice, genuine conversation.  John is coming, Dorinda’s boyfriend, and Dorinda’s happy with him.  “You have to remember, we don’t live together,” Dorinda reminds Bethenny.  LOL.  Dorinda goes on to say that what she has with John is a different kind of love than she had with Richard (her husband, who passed away in 2011).  She feels like Bethenny had that type of love with Dennis, too, and you don’t just get that again.  Bethenny fills Dorinda in on the engagement ring – and we learn that Dennis gave Brynn a ring, too, which I thought was beyond sweet. Both of the ladies are emotional.

John arrives, as does Luann and Barbara.  Dorinda tells Bethenny she plans on confronting Luann tonight, and Barbara immediately wants to put her two cents in.  Dorinda tells her to butt out basically, and Barbara is offended.  She practically runs back to Lu to tell her what Dorinda is saying.

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Bethenny calls Lu over, and Dorinda is freaking out.  They both approach each other – and then we’re hit with a TO BE CONTINUED.

Thoughts?

Until next week…

xo

RHONY: THINGS ARE GOING SOUTHAMPTON

 

 

 

Season 11 Taglines are here! I have to start with those before we even get into anything else.

Lu – I plead guilty to being fabulous.

Ramona – The only thing I’ll ever settle for is more.

Sonja – People call me over the top, but lately I prefer being a bottom. (You guys, I am literally dead at this one. DEAD.)

Tinsley – Game, set, now I need a match. (Thanks for reminding us you’re not with Scott in real time anymore, Tins!!)

Bethenny – When life gives me limes, I make margaritas.

Dorinda – If you’ve got a problem with me, that’s your problem. (LMAO.)

Leave me a comment and let me know which one is your fav!

We’re at Ramona’s in Southampton, and Tinsley and Sonja just arrived.  I’m literally LOLing when Sonja gets out of the car; “Tinsley’s a great driver!  She’s gonna be a great mother, who knew!” The blondes are all together, and Dorinda has brought mermaid outfits.  I am dying at this.  Dorin has made a promise to herself to that she wants to do more fun, lighthearted stuff.  LMAO.

We’re still at Bethenny’s with Lu & Barb.  They’re talking about relationships.

Over at Ramona’s, we learn that Ramona had reached out and invited Lu and Bethenny to have dinner with her & the girls, but she’s not surprised that she never heard back from Bethenny.  Ramona always has to go low, though.  She tells us in her confessional, “It’s okay, Bethenny doesn’t get close to anyone.  Who is she close to?  Right now it’s Lu by default.”  Oh, Ramona…

Lu calls Sonja, and Sonja answers, while Ramona listens in on their convo. “I’m surprised you’re not staying with me,” Lu says.  “You’re staying with Ro-MEANa.”  (Eye roll, grow up, Lu.)  Sonja says how she switches off who she stays with during the Summer, and LMAO, it sounds like she has divorced parents fighting over her. “You’re a traitor,” Lu says teasingly.  Lu is planning her own dinner, and I love how Sonja literally just flip flops and agrees to go with Lu, Bethenny and Barb, instead of Ramona, Tinsley and Dorinda. Barbara mentions her clambake, and Sonja tells the girls, “Barbara’s inviting all of us to her clambake tomorrow.”  LMAO, no she did not.  These women literally kill me.

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The Blondes seriously have a mermaid photoshoot and I am dying.  Especially at how long it took Ramona to get down the stairs, LMAO.
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Sonja gets dropped off at The Almond Bar to meet the brunettes, and the three other blondes are basically across the street from them, having their own dinner.  The blondes are at Topping Rose House, and as soon as they sit down at the table, Ramona gets up and is like, “I’ve been with you girls all day, I’m going to go to the bar for ten minutes.” LMAO.  (I seriously laughed out loud at so many parts during this episode. Ramona is such a trip.)

Sonja and Barbara are the first to arrive, and they’re chatting and catching up.  Sonja tells Barbara that Dorinda isn’t drinking, and that Lu and Dorinda are both taking care of themselves. “They’re both going to be at your party tomorrow,” Sonja says.  Barbara pauses for a moment and then replies, “We need to talk about that.  Lu’s in vulnerable state and doesn’t want to be around Dorinda.  Can you just bring Tinsley?”  (Really, Barbara?  For starters, you literally already invited Dorinda – you told us you had an actual friendship with her.  That’s so tacky.  If you want to uninvite her, do it yourself.)  Sonja looks perplexed and asks, “What am I supposed to tell my hostess?  She’s excited to come.”
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Luann, Bethenny, and Lu’s friend Anne arrive.

Switching back over to The Blondes, Dorinda and Tinsley are chatting, and they both feel weird knowing that the other girls are eating right across the street.  “It’s like dueling dinners,” Dorinda says.  Ramona returns, and she tells the girls how she was chatting with some guys at the bar and asked if they were married – and they were married, to each other.  She thinks her gaydar is off.

The Brunette’s are talking about Lu’s recovery.  Prior to her second rehab stay, Lu had been making really bad financial decisions.  She was obsessed with this mansion, and was calling everyone she knew for $6 million dollars so she could buy it.  (WHAT?)  Bethenny tells us, “It was a fixation.”  Luann is grateful for the support of her friends and their intervention.  She admits that, “Alcohol is a power greater than me.”  They talk about the clambake that’s going to take place the next day, and Lu wants Dorinda to call her and to be genuine, and then she’ll be okay with her going to the clambake.  (This is so childish.)

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The next morning, Ramona has a tennis instructor come over to the house.  Tinsley, Ramona and the instructor are all playing  – and the instructor, who Ramona loves to flirt with, is clearly into Tinsley.  Ramona isn’t having it.  She legit stops playing, and is like, “Well, I already worked out today, and I haven’t played tennis that much because it’s been rainy.”  She’s so over the top.

Meanwhile, Bethenny is meeting Barbara.  We’re at her investment property, and she’s contemplating selling it.  Barbara is into contracting, so she wants her opinion on it. (That house was absolutely gorgeous.)

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The Blondes are all chatting – they ask Sonja about her dinner with The Brunette’s the night before.  “It was a lot about Lu and her recovery, she went back to rehab.”  Ramona, who can never bite her tongue, says, “How do you go to rehab for 13 days?  That’s like a vacation.”  Dorinda wants to know when she actually went to rehab, and Sonja just wants to shut this down.  “The mood of the dinner was not dissecting Lu and her recovery, but supporting her.”  Dorinda feels like if any trigger is going to cause Lu to fall off the wagon, she probably shouldn’t be doing cabarets late night around booze.  She thinks she probably needs a longer stay at rehab.  (I totally don’t think that’s a fair thing for Dorinda to say – she hasn’t even been on speaking terms with Lu, so since she doesn’t know first hand, I don’t think she has a right to comment on her sobriety.)

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Sonja drops the bomb – only she and Tinsley are invited to the clambake.  Dorinda is pissed, and understandably so.  She’s like, “I’ve already been told about the clambake. Should I call her and say I’m disinvited?”

Sonja tells her that The Brunette’s all think it’s a good idea for Dorinda to give Lu a call.  Dorinda immediately is like, “No.”  Sonja tells her that Barbara just wants to make sure Luann is comfortable, and Dorinda replies, ” I don’t have to make Lu anything.  That’s not my responsibility.”  Tinsley seems to be siding with Dorinda right now – she feels like Lu almost wants to make this worse.

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Bethenny and Barbara are at Bethenny’s when Barbara gets a call from Dorinda.  “What’s going on?” Dorinda asks. “I’m disinvited to the clambake?”  Barbara replies, “You’re not disinvited at all.”  (That’s a lie.)

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Dorinda is livid at this point.  “So you’re saying you want me to call Lu?  I’m not doing it.”  Barbara tries to talk, but Dorinda will not let her get a word in.  At this point, I don’t even know what anyone is saying.  Ramona is like a bug in Dorinda’s ear, and I think she’s making the situation worse.

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Bethenny is shocked by the entire conversation.  Dorinda tells Barbara that she wants Luann to call her, LMAO.  I’ll admit, Dorinda is definitely being petty.  But this whole situation is petty at this point; lets move on!  Bethenny tells Barbara, “It’s like you’re talking to a wall.”

Dorinda uninvites herself, and tells Barbara she’ll see her back in the city.  All of the girls are like, “Don’t end the call like that!” but Dorinda is way too riled up.  She tells us that she’s not going to bend the knee to Luann.

Barbara calls Lu, and fills her in on what happened.  Lu says she isn’t surprised at all, she had a feeling that Dorinda would respond that way.  “Not only is she not going to apologize, but I don’t think she would piss on you if you were on fire,” Bethenny tells her. LMAO. Barbara is blown away by the call, and Lu says that she thinks Dorinda is still drinking.  Barbara doesn’t think so, especially because Sonja told them that she wasn’t.

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The girls are all getting ready for the clambake, except for Dorinda, who really isn’t going.  I’m shocked that Ramona is planning on going, but that’s Ramona for you.  Dorinda and Ramona are sitting outside, and Dorinda asks for Ramona’s opinion on a text she plans on sending Lu.  (Dorin – please get anyone else’s opinion besides Ramona’s!!!!)  Ramona tells her she thinks it’s totally fine to send it to her, and I’m like, Oh God.  I can only imagine what that text says.

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Barbara and Luann are picking up the food for the clambake when Lu receives the text from Dorinda.  OMFG – she sent her a Tyler Perry quote.  I don’t remember the entire quote, it’s something about forgiveness though.  LMAO.  “I’m not even going to respond,” Lu says.  Then she says, “Or maybe I’ll say,’Wow, that’s so deep’.”  “No,” Barbara tells her, “That’s antagonistic.”

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It’s the day of Barbara’s Clambake, and Lu shares the text she got from Dorinda with Bethenny.  Bethenny is basically on the same wavelength as everyone else – “She sent you a Tyler Perry quote?”  Bethenny adds, “Now she’s Ramona crazy!”

The Blondes feel bad leaving Dorinda behind, but Dorinda honestly doesn’t mind, she likes her alone time.  Sonja mentions Dorinda has FOMO – but she calls it MOFO, LMAO.  On the ride to Barbara’s, Ramona tells Tinsley to tap her on the shoulder after 30 minutes, because she feels like that’s an appropriate time length to be at the party and then confront Luann about Dorinda.  (DEAD LMAO.)  She then tells her to tap her on the shoulder after one hour, because they promised Dorinda they’d only go for an hour.

The Four Blondes arrive, and Sonja is the first to enter the backyard.  Lu notices, and her entire face drops when she sees Ramona in tow.

Not a crazy entertaining episode, but I was entertained nonetheless.  I don’t know where I stand on this Lu & Dorinda fight. I think that they’re both being stubborn and need to just make up with each other.  (I also haven’t seen the episode where Dorinda was apparently a monster to Lu, though.)  But Luann is really holding a grudge here, and part of the 12 steps is to kind of put the past in the past, move on, not hang onto any resentment.  I’m not saying she isn’t valid in feeling the way she feels, and I probably shouldn’t say anything at all because I’m not an addict and I don’t understand what she’s been through or how she feels.  But I don’t think it’s healthy for either of them to hold onto this negativity.  Even if they’re not friends again (which I seriously hope they do become friends again) they can just be cordial and coexist.  I hate this pettiness.

Until next week….

xo